Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Help with potty training

Posted by on Jan. 18, 2018 at 2:12 PM
  • 7 Replies

I am really struggling with some of the final steps of potty training my daughter who is 2 and a half.  I think we have been working on this in some form for a year now.  We moved and stopped pushing for a bit because she was upset. She's regressed a few times and various ways. I am sure one problem is a struggle with consistency with 3 adults on different schedules it all just depends on who is with her.


She showed interest around 18 months at daycare and so we started. It took months for her to actually use the potty but she'd sit on it for long periods of time.  She uses the potty now if we take her but she will never ask to go potty or tell us she needs to go. She rarely tells us if she is wet either.  We always celebrate when she goes and tried a reward chart.  She would melt down when she wasn't allowed to color the space for part of potty training so it made it worse. She also started lying about being wet because I think she thought we'd be upset. We have NEVER punished her for going in her diaper but always remind her we want her to keep her pullup dry and try to use the potty.

A few months back we tried putting her in panties and she got hysterical when the pee ran down her leg. It backfired really badly on us. She started crying at the idea of the potty and holding it until she couldnt then sobbing when she got wet. So we stopped that method because she literally held it until going hurt and that did not help.  This was using thin regular kid panties.

Recently, we have tried using those thicker panties that catch the start of an accident because I agree that her pullup is not bothering her enough.  We have used these a couple times. She likes them a lot and says after usally that she does not want to wear her pullup. However, she will just pee in them and then sit wet  not saying a word. It had only been about 45 minutes and when I took her to the potty again she was soaked and didn't seem to notice! So I'm not sure how to do this.

I feel like a failure with this training issue. I try taking her about every 45 minutes but she can hold it forever!  If she doesn't need to go through one or two attempts the next time I try to take her she cries and cries about going. I don't want her to hate the potty, but I don't know how to get her to let us know she needs to go and keep her going in the potty. 




by on Jan. 18, 2018 at 2:12 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-7):
oliveoil423
by Bronze Member on Jan. 18, 2018 at 2:21 PM
I started my two older ones at the age of three.

But I used the training undies with my oldest we just did the potty time every 30 minutes at home and she has a set time at preschool when she started for bathroom breaks. Shes 5 now


My son he started at the age of 3. We just used pull ups and he still went to the bathroom. Now he is in big boy undies. He will have a few accident sometimes.

I would put her back in big girl undies cause the ones your using doesn't seem to do any good like the pull ups. Have her use the bathroom every 30 minutes and use something for a rewards.
fullxbusymom
by Member on Jan. 19, 2018 at 9:42 AM

You're really not going to like what I have to say but she isn't ready yet.  You guys started this WAY to early.  Just let her be for a few more months then when you are actually ready to fully train underwear only 100% of the time other than for bed or naps. On the potty every 20-30mins.   She isn't telling you she has to pee because she probably doesn't know that she has too go.  

Gamma13
by New Member on Jan. 19, 2018 at 9:43 AM

I did wonder about it being early when we started but she's 2 and a half now.  That doesn't seem early to me. I won't be able to do underwear 100% because she's in daycare but I can do it at home. Definitely food for thought though.

Quoting fullxbusymom:

You're really not going to like what I have to say but she isn't ready yet.  You guys started this WAY to early.  Just let her be for a few more months then when you are actually ready to fully train underwear only 100% of the time other than for bed or naps. On the potty every 20-30mins.   She isn't telling you she has to pee because she probably doesn't know that she has too go.  


fullxbusymom
by Member on Jan. 19, 2018 at 9:46 AM

Fact of the matter is 90% of children are not potty trained until close to their 3rd birthdays also potty training should never take more than a few days.  If you can't do underwear 100% of the time until she is fully trained then you start it over a long weekend when you will be home for 3 or 4 days in a row.  Then she goes back fully trained and in underwear.  

Quoting Gamma13:

I did wonder about it being early when we started but she's 2 and a half now.  That doesn't seem early to me. I won't be able to do underwear 100% because she's in daycare but I can do it at home. Definitely food for thought though.

Quoting fullxbusymom:

You're really not going to like what I have to say but she isn't ready yet.  You guys started this WAY to early.  Just let her be for a few more months then when you are actually ready to fully train underwear only 100% of the time other than for bed or naps. On the potty every 20-30mins.   She isn't telling you she has to pee because she probably doesn't know that she has too go.  



Gamma13
by New Member on Jan. 19, 2018 at 10:07 AM

Wow. That's really different from anything I've ever been told. Thanks for the information. Definitely a new strategy to look at since this is not working! Thanks.

Quoting Gamma13:

I am really struggling with some of the final steps of potty training my daughter who is 2 and a half.  I think we have been working on this in some form for a year now.  We moved and stopped pushing for a bit because she was upset. She's regressed a few times and various ways. I am sure one problem is a struggle with consistency with 3 adults on different schedules it all just depends on who is with her.


She showed interest around 18 months at daycare and so we started. It took months for her to actually use the potty but she'd sit on it for long periods of time.  She uses the potty now if we take her but she will never ask to go potty or tell us she needs to go. She rarely tells us if she is wet either.  We always celebrate when she goes and tried a reward chart.  She would melt down when she wasn't allowed to color the space for part of potty training so it made it worse. She also started lying about being wet because I think she thought we'd be upset. We have NEVER punished her for going in her diaper but always remind her we want her to keep her pullup dry and try to use the potty.

A few months back we tried putting her in panties and she got hysterical when the pee ran down her leg. It backfired really badly on us. She started crying at the idea of the potty and holding it until she couldnt then sobbing when she got wet. So we stopped that method because she literally held it until going hurt and that did not help.  This was using thin regular kid panties.

Recently, we have tried using those thicker panties that catch the start of an accident because I agree that her pullup is not bothering her enough.  We have used these a couple times. She likes them a lot and says after usally that she does not want to wear her pullup. However, she will just pee in them and then sit wet  not saying a word. It had only been about 45 minutes and when I took her to the potty again she was soaked and didn't seem to notice! So I'm not sure how to do this.

I feel like a failure with this training issue. I try taking her about every 45 minutes but she can hold it forever!  If she doesn't need to go through one or two attempts the next time I try to take her she cries and cries about going. I don't want her to hate the potty, but I don't know how to get her to let us know she needs to go and keep her going in the potty. 





mrsniebo
by Bronze Member on Jan. 19, 2018 at 10:08 AM
That's a tough situation to be in. My oldest potty trained at 19 months, but still would have occasional accidents until she was close to 3. My third has been resistant to even trying to use the potty (she's almost 2.5 years), but hasn't been having accidents. It sounds like your DD may just not quite be ready for potty training.
Gamma13
by New Member on Jan. 19, 2018 at 10:16 AM

Thanks. It is frustrating because when I read about the "signs" she was doing that. She follows us to the bathroom. She was originally excited about the potty. She stays dry for long periods of time. I guess she's close but not quite there.

Quoting mrsniebo: That's a tough situation to be in. My oldest potty trained at 19 months, but still would have occasional accidents until she was close to 3. My third has been resistant to even trying to use the potty (she's almost 2.5 years), but hasn't been having accidents. It sounds like your DD may just not quite be ready for potty training.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)