I shared a vagrant optimism that some of us were making real progress, that we had taken an honest road, and that the best of us would inevitably make it over the top. At the same time, I shared a dark suspicion that life we were leading was a lost cause, that we were all actors kidding ourselves along on a senseless odyssey. It was the tension between theses two poles- a restless idealism on the one hand and a sense of impending doom on the other – that kept me going. Hunter S.Thompson -Rum Diary

And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life...