Im a first time mother of a gorgeous baby girl. I didnt expect to have kids EVER! I was a bar hopping partier with a severe case of bipolar. couldnt stay with a guy more then a year EVER! Terrified of needles and doctors. As usual fell inlove and the story I cant have kids came about because not using a condom was just so much better, chancing all the diseases out there because your just iving for the moment...not wanting him to leave me decided to have baby...went through HELL got married moved out my parents house all within a year..went through the post par crap..thought i was gonna die soo many fights threats of who was taking the baby when i wanted to leave to cool down. Thank god a have such a supporting family im very lucky! my baby is now 5 months. Yet i feel sooo alone and tired my huband works 6 days a week i feel like im raising her on my own when she cries he always is handing her off to me...i do everything ..he doesnt even know how to pack a diaper bag none or less what goes into one. He controls me not by telling me what to do and not to do but when i do something he gives me shit about it and thats not controlling when it happens over and over again? Fathers shouldnt be told when to change there baby, when to feed there baby, when to bathe the baby or when to pick the baby up when you need some alone time and you havnt rushed to pick the baby up after a few minutes like you always do. I fear to go back to work because all she will do is sleep so he can play his video games or watch his porno's! He is a great man and i love him with all my heart wich is why it makes it so difficult to leave. I know y women let themselves go and the men cheat and 95% of the time its because your too busy taking care of the baby and being mad at him you never have time for yourself..and thats just not fair.. im stuck on noggin 24/7 yo gabba gaba she just cant get enough...doing nutro sysem to loose the 39 lbs of baby fat i cant get rid of! walking 4 miles dont even burn a pound when after u have a baby WTF? I dont know any other mothers of babies mines age...and the few i do know are psycho..i thought smoking a ciggarette while walking your baby was harmfeul? whatever people are dumb i feel better watching noggin with my girl...cooking cleaning and reading...although i am sick and tired of cleaning up after my pig assed husband who cant even throw his empty soda cans out....im not a freakin maid ...i mean i know he works 7am-4 to pay bill right now..but i work 24/7 with a my daughter thats a worse fuckin job no alone time ever!!!All i ask is pick up your fuckin garbage...if i knew what i was getting myself into when he promised he would help me 100%...i think i would have rethought everything.....but i look a my princess so well behaved so gorgeous so sweet is she the perfect baby? do i only think she's gorgeous because shes my daughter?? Who cares i wouldnt trade her in for anything in this world...i have something to finally be proud of and nobody can ever take that away from me!