Just sitting here feeling a need to write

[LaSagen]

I have written to a few Cafemoms. Now I just want to ramble  some of my thoughts out. I love to write, but find little time to do it. Writing helps me keep my sanity. As I write things out I find relief from my torments. Often writing helps me find solutions and options to  conflicts rumbling inside of me.

With my Lupus it is hard to keep going. Chronic pain, physical ,mental fatigue bring on depression,and hopelessness. There are days I just don't want to do anything, yet there is always so much needing done. I realize there are things I should have done years ago, because now it is much harder to make it happen. My mind is still quick and alert, but my body doesn't have the strength and endurance it once had. It doesn't look the same either. Over the years I put on weight , and then because of the Lupus I was on prednisone for four years,which caused a huge weight gain. I am off of it now, but the weight isn't coming off as quickly as I would like.

On a more positive not, I have a wonderful husband who has been so compassionate and supportive. He has put up with my weight gain, moods and even slows down for me when we are walking. He knows that sometimes even simple tasks are a struggle for me. Still he loves me and helps me with cooking, cleaning, shopping, and the kids. I am so blessed.

My kids are good kids too. They are a bit lazy , but will do what I ask  if I ask. It can't be easy for them to have a mom that is unable to do as much assome other moms. I have 6 kids who I love so much, and 4 grands to top it all off. What a good life I real have. Now if it would just quit raining and blowing outside. I am so glad we have been protected against the tornadoes that thrashed away in many place of the country.

Life is Pretty Good, and I am Glad I am Alive and still able to Enjoy it.

[armywife0107]

May. 24, 2008 at 2:27 PM My grandmother also has Lupus and has had it for many years now. She has her good days and of course bad ones too. She now moved to Michigan to live with my father (She was living alone-hubby passed of cancer years ago). She could live on her own but working to pay bills were too much on her. She really seems like she is doing well now. Keep your chin up! I will be praying for you and your family! Good luck sweetie! 

[LifeAmbassador]

May. 24, 2008 at 2:47 PM It is so difficult to live with limitation of any kind. I pray that you will find a little comfort in knowing that you are not alone in your suffering, and that I join you in that long line to be in the same boat. I even left a prayer request in my Life Walk Bible Study Group yesterday, because the pain and the discomfort was so great, I was truly discouraged, and felt very alone it it. My family too has pitched in and everyone does so much around the house for me now, because I simply feel as though I am well enough to sit on the bed some days. I guess it is why I so highly value this website, because it gives me a chance to do something I fell like I CAN do, when I feel as though I can do so little anymore. Thank you for sharing your heart with us. God bless you!!!