Healthy and Safe Sex
- May 31, 2008 at 9:08 AM by barbar73069
- 16 Comment(s)
- 257 Total Views
I just read a post in one of my groups that got me riled up. A few Moms were talking about how they wouldn't provide condoms to their teenagers. They said they wouldn't provide condoms and they wouldn't allow their kids to have sex. Jesus Christ...what are these people thinking? Now how in the hell can you prevent teenagers from having sex once they decide to do it? Do these moms think they can just tell their kids that they can't have sex and the kids will listen? WTF?
Ok now I admit I'm pretty liberal and as I've posted before I think sex can be wonderful in committed relationships. Yes even for teenagers! Teens have the same sex drive as we adults do, they maybe have an even stronger desire for sex than we do. You can't just say, no don't have sex and no I won't provide you condoms or birth control. That is a sure recipe for unwanted pregnancies. If you tell your kids how bad sex is and how wrong it is....how do you expect them to be able to talk to you and come to you for guidance? All that is accomplished is to force the kids to sneak around and many times engage in unsafe sex.
Now I don't think casual sex for teenagers is a good thing at all, but it is our job as parents to talk to our kids, make them know they can talk to us about anything, and keep the lines of communication open. By doing this, we can hope they will listen to us and come to us when they have serious issues they are dealing with. Kids need to know that they can say "NO" to sex but they also need to know to be safe when and if they do decide that they want to take that step.
Finding out your teenager is sexually active can be a traumatic experience for parents, but it's a fact of life that nowadays many kids will not wait until marriage to start having sex. So we as parents can either accept it and guide our kids to be happy, healthy and safe, or we can say OMFG, no way, you can't have sex.
As your teenagers grow up, it's important to listen to them, talk to them and not be judgemental. I'm definitely not saying we should encourage our kids to be sexually active, but many kids will take that step and we need to be there for them. Kids need to know that once they take that step it is something they can't get back, but it can also be a very wonderful experience that enhances a loving committed relationship.
So my point in all this rambling is, talk to your kids, listen to them, and don't freak out when you find out they've had sex. Be willing to get your daughter birth control, have the condoms available and hopefully our kids will learn to have healthy loving relationships when the time comes. I'm sure not everyone agrees with this post but it's just my humble thoughts.
- Written by barbar73069 on May 31, 2008 at 9:08 AM
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Comments:
When my boys "come of age" I plan to educate them about it. You can't stop teens from having sex, so the responsible thing to do is to teach THEM to be responsible. Good grief, they need to be taught how to protect themselves from STDs. I'll provide them with condoms.
I may not like it if my boys are sexually active as young teens (some kids are at 13...) but I'd rather not like it and protect them than to try to fool myself into believing they won't do it if I tell them not to. I'd rather they know they can come to me about anything than to have them feel like they have to hide their life from me.
Cheers! I"m right there with you sister. I decided along time ago that when my daughter was the age for the talk, I would tell her that if she has the slightest inclination that she was going to have sex with someone to she can talk to me, or Grandma, or Aunt Paige, or Aunt Angel etc, and we would take her and get her on birth control and buy her condoms to protect her against STD's and pregnancy. You know you can't always rely that the man/boy will have a condom on him. I've had A LOT of parents look at me like I was crazy when I tell them this.
You know what I say to them, "When your daughter comes home knocked up I won't look crazy then." or "When your son gets gonorrhea, I'll start looking pretty smart."
I certainly don't think you're crazy. Birth control helps on the pregnancy part, but not the STD factor. Even though we have boys, before we decided two was enough, hubby and I already agreed that if we ever had a daughter, she'd be supplied with condoms and taught how to use them. Why? You are VERY right in not relying on the guy to have one.
Great post! Its the truth, teens are going to have sex if they decide they are going to and no amount of parents saying "NO NO NO NO NO" is going to change their mind. All they will accomplish by this is pushing their kids away from them and not feeling like they can come to them if they need to.
Isn't it funny how people who are against abortion are also against birth control and condoms?
Hello! McFly!
Great post! Its the truth, teens are going to have sex if they decide they are going to and no amount of parents saying "NO NO NO NO NO" is going to change their mind. All they will accomplish by this is pushing their kids away from them and not feeling like they can come to them if they need to.
Isn't it funny how people who are against abortion are also against birth control and condoms?
Hello! McFly!
So true and (not trying to offend anyone here) the boys get off scot-free, being allowed to finish school in a normal high school, while the girls have to choose to either 1. finish school at a cyber school/ continuation school 2. drop out of school completely. I think it's a load of crap.
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Jesus Christ is exactly what these people are thinking ;) Most of the time it's religion or bible-related, and their close-mindedness makes them ignorant to what they don't want to see or believe. It has to do with a certain set of "morals" if you want to call it that, that is unwavering and usually applies more to their children than it does to them. It makes them incredibly hypocritical, since most of them I can guarantee did NOT wait until marriage to have sex..
I agree with you :)
nobakecheezcake May. 31, 2008 at 9:13 AM