Hi ladies, yesterday afternoon I took my kids to the movies and who should sit down across the aisle from us (in the same row!) but my ex and his new GF! I said nothing to the kids and tried not to stare -- she was not cute at all! -- but they must have seen us and got up and moved to the back of the theatre -- and must have run out when the movie ended because we didn't see them. Before they noticed us they were laughing and talking and it felt so strange. How would you have felt?

Then took the kids to a girlfriend's house for pizza with her family. She and her husband were asking about my divorce (they don't know me well) and I felt so ill after rehashing all of it for them. I divorced after 15 years of marriage because of massive financial deception. My ex tricked me into signing a power of attorney when I was pregnant and cashed most of the equity out of our house -- that's civil and criminal fraud. I didn't find out for a year and if I didn't find out on my own I'm sure he wouldn't have told me. We went to two counselors but it just continued. I found out he took more money from our home equity and never told me -- and that he rang up huge credit card bills on cards I didn't even know he had -- had the bills sent to his office. He was never sorry for any of it.

So now I'm divorced, am living in a tiny place, only get to see my kids half the time, and everything seems to be rosy for him -- business booming, new GF that he wants to marry even though they known each other for a few months, etc. Why does it all feel so crappy still, after nearly 2 years? Ladies, I really need some kind words this morning. Please help...


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Jun. 1, 2008 at 9:04 AM

My heart goes out to you.  When I left... let's call him Ethan... a beautiful older woman told me the best revenge was living well.  Your place is tiny, is it homey?  Is it comfy?  Is it yours? 

I just finished reading Choosing Hapiness by Alexandra Stoddard.  She talks about celebrating the little things... planting flowers, listening to wonderful music...pretty underwear...having a love affair with yourself...

Being happy, joyful is a choice.  Choose well!

Let me know if I can help...

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Jun. 3, 2008 at 8:25 PM

Hi, I wish that all can go away, I'm with you my ex left after 11 years and still don't know how will I react when I see him with the GF, but all the help you can get is to try and focus on your self, to enjoy life, that is what the books and therapist told me. You need to know that you are one person complete and that need to enjoy your self again.

Best of luck.

Remember today is better than yesterday and tomorrow will be better than today

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Jun. 3, 2008 at 8:32 PM i got my divorce as my ex was cheating on me and i left and moved with my parents in ca but when i did see my ex with his new b- i could not stand her she made me sick so do you two share the kids or do you have them most of the time?

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