I hate this, I woke up feeling terror.  I wasn't dreaming of stbx or the divorce, but I open my eyes and I'm in a state of mild terror.  I hate that and I hate him for everything.  Okay, hate is too strong a word but you all know what i mean. 

I'm so upset that I'm being pressured to work full time.  I'm not lazy, I just don't want to see my 14 year old alone so much.  It's ridiculous.  In a few years, she'll be older and probably driving, so down the road makes sense, but not now.  

It is so gorgous ouside, so hopefull, that will take away the mild panic attack I'm having.



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