Ya know it amazes me sometimes looking back upon my life how many hard life lessons I've learned. How many came as a shock and how many came expected because other's told me they would. When your young you think your invinsible, can do anything when it comes to matters of the heart and that love will take care of all. Once you begin to grow older and live life for a while out in the world you find out very quickly that love doesnt take care of all and sometimes you must listen to reason and your mind rather than just your heart. These sorts of lessons are the hardest I've found to go through and learn from as it really is an emotional rollercoaster no matter how you look at them.

This type of lesson is one someone in my family is going through right now. She thinks things are stacked against her, she feels as though no one understands and what she's going through is foriegn to us all. How wrong is that, I mean we've all gone through it and know the feelings of heartbreak, not being able to do what you want all the time, and that someone you love is totally wrong for you and possibly never loved you to begin with. The old saying "actions speak louder than words" rings so true with this situation, yet she refuses to see, refuses to accept that someone's actions really are screaming "stay away from me" yet she continues to think with her heart. Is that wrong, absolutely not because we've all done it, although there comes a time when you can no longer live life that way. There are too many factors to take into consideration and while we all would love to live life according to our hearts, reality steps in and knocks you to the ground, blindsides you and makes you wonder what in the world happened.

I'm not sure how to help her through this other than to be understanding in how she's feeling. On the same front however I must stay strong in my stance to trying to make her see the light in what has happened is for the best. Do I think she will listen? I have no idea as it seems while she says one thing I have a feeling she's going another. Reality will one day show it's ugly face and she will see the light, but how late will that come? Will it come before she does something stupid, or will time start to really heal and reveal what we've all known as reality to her? I dont have any answers to  these questions, gosh you dont know how much I wish I did. I can only hope and pray reality sets in, her eyes are opened and she realizes the choices she's had to make recently are for her own well being because we all love her and want to protect her.

I know for a fact that we will not always be able to protect her and I'm okay with that, I know that there are hard life lessons she will learn on her own, having to face the consequences of her choices and actions and I'm prepared for that. I've now become prepared for a lot of things I never thought I would this soon, but as always that's life and life is hard and so not fair. Even now at my age there are things I hate about life and living it properly, I too wish things could be different in certain areas, but they arent and I try and live life knowing that my heart will sometimes cloud my judgement, it is however my choice if I allow that to happen or not.

So here I sit, waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for other's life choices to be wrong and not in their best interest. Will that happen? I dont know, but in order to protect myself and be completely prepared for it is what I need to do. Has the truth been revealed about the entire situation? No, it certainly has not and we know this, so it has become a waiting game as to what happens next in this tradgic saga because this is one of those hard life lessons!

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