I really am a live and live person. I get frustrated sometimes but angry is a feeling I can count the times I have harbored. I don't even know if angry is the word for the way I feel towards parents who do this. I just absolutely have no respect for people who have children and don't raise them. There are so many options out there. My birth mom was a heroin addict who never got clean. She had the love though to admit that she couldn't take care of her two girls. She let both of us be raised by our prospective fathers and "step-moms." Adoption is available, as well as birth control to prevent having children before one is ready. I believe that no matter what your place in life is, once you have a child you are a parent and that is your number one responsibility. It angers me to see people pass their kids off to their parents, robbing everyone of a grandparent/grandchild relationship that is so valuable. It doesn't upset me unless the parent manipulates their parent-stepping in and out when it is convenient for them. If you really "can't" or won't raise your child at least leave them with some level of consistency. Don't use your child they are not puppets. I have zero tolerance for child abuse or neglect as well. These are the only things that people really do that I just cannot and will not accept as okay, no matter the circumstance. Other than that we are all human-I'll allow for errors. This though is a large part of why adopting our daughter felt like such a special blessing. Her birth mom wasn't neglecting her child. I got to be part of a solution even if only in one or two cases.

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tryin...
Jun. 2, 2008 at 12:19 AM

I completely agree. My mom was dumped over at her grandma's house when she was little. She really missed her mom and every so often her mom would show up wasted talking about she has married - yet again - and has made a room for her in the new house. So she'd take my mom and show her this beautiful bedroom and tell her that she can't come today, but she'll be living it in soon. The days never came. She did this over and over and my mom was crushed ea. time. My mom has major depression issues and post traumatic stress disorder due to a bunch of other crap that was all due to her mom comming over and raising hell at the grandma's. If she had just left her at Granny's and then really LEFT, I think it would have been fine, but to keep comming over with some more drama (and I mean, screaming, beatings, and cops being called ) just messed everything up. Granny was a 50yr. old widow by the way living on $200 a mo. They didn't have heat, they never had food, no hot water - no nothing. Granny didn't need another kid to raise, but she took in my mom out of love. It's just sad that it never stayed peaceful over there when it should have.

 

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