I think the moment when I got really scared during my pregnancy was on 02/25/2008 when James and I were in Morrow, Georgia trying to go fix my broken down car. A guy in our lane decided to tailgate us, and when James noticed him getting closer and closer he decided to change lanes into the left one. Suddenly we had to slow down and come to a stop because the person in front of us was making a left turn on a four lane street. Just sitting in the truck you think nothing could go wrong.

Suddenly there was a moment when everything basically was silent. Soon after there was the sound of screeching tires trying to come to a stop until our truck stopped it for him. There was the sudden jerk forward from the "low impact." James and I looked at each other and at the truck for a moment wondering what the loud noise was. It wasn't coming from us, the guy in front of us did his thing, and soon after we got rear ended by the same guy who was tailgating us. Where could we have gone? Into the next lane onto on coming traffic?

The seatbelt slightly tightened around my stomach. My eyes were widened, and I looked back at the person in the Nissan Frontier with widened eyes in total disbelief. How could one person continue to tailgate us, I thought. I turned back around and sat there, loosening the seatbelt. James took my cellphone and called the cops. The guy actually had the audacity to say "There's nothing wrong with your truck, you can just go and leave now."

Yes, the person who slammed into us had a greater amount of damage (basically his whole front end was crunched in because of the F150's bumper ball. The only damage that we had on our Ford F150 was their wind shield washer fluid, radiator fluid, and some paint... but the fact that remains is HE STILL HIT US and I was about four months pregnant at the time, right? Leaving a "scene of a crime" would put the fault on us, and it wasn't our fault so we stayed and did what we had to do. The police report showed that the guy was at fault anyway by the way his car was angled.

The officer called up an ambulance and took me to the hospital. I waited patiently for about 15-30 minutes waiting to be transferred over to the ER only to be taken to the Labor and Delivery area. Got transferred over to an ultrasound room where I had my first ultrasound done. A weight was lifted off my shoulders when I saw that my kid was still alive, and that I was able to "find out" the gender of the kid even though I'm still a bit skeptical.

I've cried that day from the moment we got hit on and off to the time I got released from the hospital. I was relieved at the end of the night. My mother and my boyfriend were both at the hospital when I came out. The first thing I did when I got up from the wheelchair was walk over to my boyfriend and hug him tightly, crying into his shoulder. I've been wanting to do that for hours, and I've finally been given the chance to give him the first bit of good news he had that day.

Turns out that the guy who hit us was either driving his wife's, sister's, or mother's car. He was twenty-six years old and not even belonging to the county we were in. It's kind of because of him that I'm afraid to drive around this state or anywhere. Now when I get in my boyfriend's truck I basically tense up when I know he is a safe driver. I just don't trust the people around here because most of them don't even know how to take care of vehicles or themselves!

But moving on I must add that I'm happy I still have my kid after all these months. I cant wait until these sixty days or so are over and Nicholas (or Ophelia) comes out. I will try my hardest to make sure they have a fun life. I mean, come on, how cool is it to have a mother and father who both act childish at times and rarely argue? I'm sure that out of all the artistic things I've done and all the things I've contributed to this planet that Nicholas (or Ophelia) will be my masterpiece. Already he/she hasn't let me down yet and that is what makes me glad because I didn't lose my baby. It took a long time but finally my kid is the first thing that's made me feel truly alive in a long time and made me realize how precious and fragile life really is.


Sorry for the bad quality but this is a camera phone shot of the ultrasound image of his face from week 20, day three. I have all my doctor appointments and events listed on a calendar I've made so I kind of know how recent his things are. I don't think he or she knows it yet but I'm his biggest fan and I love him to pieces even though he/she is making me wait. I cant complain.

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 8:19 AM oh yikes, im glad you are okay and I know what you mean abiut people right on your bum.. I hate that then when you  change lanes and try to get away from them and they follow freaks me out, i pull over and let them by

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 8:24 AM

I suppose you can say I am following rule one: I'm looking out for "number one." The kid in my stomach is number one, and my top priority right now and until I'm on my death bed. I don't care what happens to me as long as no physical harm or other form of harm is done to my kid. If it means me getting my arm snapped in several places I really wouldn't care. But losing the kid would be like losing my life. That guy shut up after my boyfriend flat out told him "there is no problem with my truck, it's true, but my girlfriend in the passenger seat is pregnant." Oii.

 Some people just need to stay off the road or re-take their driving tests. Reevaluation or something? Probably some defensive driving like I did before I started to drive. But right now I am too afraid to even be in the passenger seat of a car. I'm still kind of aggrivated with my self about it.

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