Really!  I don't understand this.  One day we're fine, the next we're not.  So, let's see.... Memorial Day weekend was awesome!  Will and I spent the weekend working together on the garage and bills.  In all honesty, it was a perfect weekend.  Exactly what it's supposed to be in my opinion.  We got things done that needed to be done and we worked together.  Thursday he stayed home sick from work, as well as Friday.  Saturday Tanis had a scouting event.  I mowed the lawn and did a few things around the house prior to scouts.  Sunday was church and Tanis' birthday.  

Now according to Will I hate him because I'm "not helping him with his stress".  I've been short tempered, yes.  I chalk it up to PMS.  Sometimes you just can't stop the snippyness before it comes out.  However, he wanted more of my attention. We spent Friday night watching movies together, same with Saturday night as he was still not feeling well.  But according to him, I hate him because I'm not giving him enough sex.  Ok, he's sick with the flu, that's not the greatest thing.  And he's a big baby when he's sick, so that's not too sexy.  Hmm... Last time was Friday morning. It's not like I'm "with-holding" from him.  I just haven't been up to it and he's been sick.  

It's either I love him or I hate him... He says I'm pushing him away, yet he tells me that I hate him, which makes me feel like he's pushing me away.  So, which is it?  Why is it?  

It's so difficult some days to live in this world.  I try to live my life as Jesus would want me to.  I live as I believe I should.  Yet, I walk in both the "world" and the "kingdom".  For those who understand what I mean, good.  I need some understanding.  Some days it's so hard to be a Christian in this house.  

I just pray that God continues to bless my life with awesome things as He has done in the past.  He has done so much for me already.  I know He will continue.  I know that one day I will make it to heaven and He will tell me that I did a good job.  The we can dance (which I can't do here) and sing and have a wonderful party forever.  

This is what keeps me going.  God.  Knowing that what I do in my life is making a difference in at least one person's life and helping see Him in theirs.  God can make the difference.  If I focus on Him I can get through this stressful time.  He will lead me through it all.  I just need to follow Him!


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