My 17 year old stepdaughter, that not too long ago wanted nothing to do with us, will be coming over this weekend.  My husband and I are leaving on Friday to go to Destin, Fl. and won't be back until Monday.  Well my oldest stepdaughter Jessica offered to pick up the kids from their grandparents on Saturday and watch them until Monday so that she could spend some time with them.  We agreed, but then I got the idea of having my husband call Amanda (the 17 yr. old) and asking her if she would like to come since we would not be here and she could have some one on one with the kids.  To my surprise she agreed.  She has been making progress, with such things as messaging my oldest on myspace and talking to her dad on the phone, but I was still not sure if she would come.  I am so glad that she has decided to!!  My oldest is very excited.  I don't know how Orion will do, because she is still a stranger to him, but I hope this will show her what she has been missing.  I know it's still a few days away and anything can change, but I am keeping my fingers crossed!!!

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 4:48 PM

dont give up

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 4:51 PM i hope you guys have a safe and fun trip and i am dure the kids will be fine

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 4:53 PM

It's a tough road - I have 2 grown step-kids - when hubby and I got together he didn't get to see his daughter much. He never said anything bad about the ex so I didn't understand why until I started talking to the ex and she showed who she really was. After some visits and spending more time with her she ended up moving in at 16 - it was good at first.

 I jumped in with both feet and loved being a stepmom. Once the newness wore off though (for her) she realized that while she was better provided for with us, she still had to follow rules. Just be careful that you don't get so excited (and want her to like you so much) that you give her a false impression of what life would be like with you guys.

We have a great relationship now, but it was tough when  I had to start saying no and setting the rules in our house. She wasn't really used to someone caring about where she was and what she was doing day to day, so it was a shock to all of the sudden have  stepmom that spoke to her teachers and expected to know where she was and when.

It can be very rewarding but realize that you NEVER insult her mother (and they will hear if you do it at all while they're in the house) and leave the discipline up to Dad. I also built a relationship with her Mom so it was easier for us to see her and I could find out what some of the issues were she was facing.

The good news - she asked me to be there (in the bridal suite) to help her get ready for her wedding and now I am enjoying being a step-grandma at 30! 

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 5:07 PM that is glad she is getting back into the family!

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 5:48 PM Awesome!  Hope all goes well!

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 7:05 PM Glad to hear that things are going well.  Have a fun & safe trip! 

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 8:08 PM So happy to hear things are looking up a little. 

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