Today I attempted, key word ATTEMPTED, to take all 5 of my children to the park by myself.  My husband and I only have one vehicle (chevy suburban), we just got it in March and I have never driven it til today.   My husband had to be in work by 1pm, SO the 2 older ones had half day, once they were home I loaded all of the kids in the car and we drove my husband to work.  So far so good with me driving the HUGE, gas guzzling vehicle.  It takes quite a bit getting used to making wide turns, parking etc... the worst is the parking for me, I used to have trouble parking our van let alone this humongous thing!  But it is a necessity with our large family, double stroller, christa's walker.  Anyways the monster truck was the least of my problems today.

I get to the park Sierra instantly runs into the sprinklers.  I go toward an empty bench and park the stroller, Charlie went with Sierra and Christa was taking off her shoes so she could go in the sprinklers as well (which was a BAD idea).  She got up to walk across the HOT rubber mats and burned her feet pretty bad, instead of speeding up she dropped to the ground only wearing a bathing suit, so she then burned her legs and rear end.. I ran over to help her up, she was crying and brought her to the sprinklers. Her feet felt a lot better in the water so she was ok for awhile.  Then she started complaining she was cold in the water, so I found a spot for her to sit off to the side.  Then she started complaining she was too hot.  So she went back in the water for a bit.  I then decided to get them all a hot dog and soda for a quick lunch.  Ok that satisfied them for a very short while.  My mom then came with my nephew, who is 5 years old and one of THE most hyper children that walks the earth.  My poor mom watches him EVERYDAY when he gets out of school and he drives her insane.  So he is a handful enough, I don't expect her to have to help me with my kids, but she does try. 

So Sierra went running off to the other side of the playground with my nephew and my mom, All of a sudden I hear Sierra's loud shrieking cry, I turn around and run over pushing the babies and I just see blood pouring from her face.  Two other mom's lifted her off the ground before I got to her.  She had tripped on the concrete by the sprinklers and went face first into the ground.  Thankfully her teeth are very strong but the blood gushing from her mouth scared the crap out of me.  She has a big cut above her lip and one of her front teeth is a bit chipped now but Thank God it wasn't any worse.  She continued crying I got her over to the bench cleaned out her mouth with water, the man sitting next to me said maybe I should get her some sort of ice cream, as soon as she heard that she stopoed crying and said "Hey mom maybe that will make me feel better" ... lol OK whew I felt a little better that something was cheering her up.  So I sent Charlie over to the ice cream truck to get her a dora ice cream.  She ate the whole thing.  When she finished she decided to play some more but kept coming over to me whining about her mouth.  I turned my back for 5 seconds to check on the babies and turned back around and Sierra was gone.. completely out of my sight.  I freaked out, kept spinning around trying to see if I could see her anywhere.  I yelled to Charlie to find Sierra, told my mom as well, and I took the babies and went running around the park screaming her name like a mad women.  Now Sierra is NOT a normal child that will reply to her name being called.  She is a wanderer and scares the crap out of me EVERYTIME she does this.  I could be RIGHT near her and she could hear me calling her and she will just look at me, will not say "hey here I am".  I ALWAYS tell her she needs to reply and she just doesn't.  Anyways, I went running in any direction I could, my mom went to the restrooms to check (was literally on the floor looking under stalls) which now when I think of it its funny, at the time it was not.  Charlie was all over the place looking, and I had moms coming up to me asking what she was wearing... I was in hysterics and couldnt think then finally I said blue and white striped bathing suit with a skirt attached and ran off.  No sooner as I was turning to where she was a mom came up to me and asked "is that your little girl" ...... and sure as heck.. there she was swinging on the little kiddy monkey bars.  Omg I swear I didn't know what came over me but I picked her up and hugged her so tight, and then started yelling at her and crying at the same time telling her how she has to stay near me and tell me where she is at all times, and most important answer when Im calling for her.  She started to cry as well.......

Needless to say  I decided it was time for us to leave.  I am in such a panic still.  It is all so overwhelming.  I feel like these are my kids, why can't I just get it right and be a good mom and not have my child get hurt and lost all in the same day.  Ugh I feel like such a shitty parent right now.  I am literally SCARED to take all 5 children out by myself EVER again.  I think it will be quite awhile before I even consider it.  And once the twins are to the mobile stage, GOD HELP ME!

Wow this turned out to be really long, if you read this thanks for getting through the whole thing.

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 5:30 PM WOW that sounds like quite the trip!! And ya, omg what will you do when they are walking around too!! YIKES! I hope everyones owies are better now!

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 5:40 PM Relax! You are doing a GREAT job. (No, really, you are!) I have stories that would make the hairs on your neck stand up and ain't one of them worse for the wear. Although, the gray is finally starting to show in mine! I've had days like that too. That is weird your daughter doesn't reply when you call her. That really needs to be addressed. Not that the situation you were in today wasn't  scary enough, but what if there was a fire in your house and you needed to get out fast? I don't mean to stress you out more,( I am a worrier at heart) It's just that  time is precious and you might not have enough of it to look for her one day. I am glad you were able to get out and I think give it a day or three and try another outing! 

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 5:42 PM yikes! im glad all is ok though and you made it threw it!

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