How do you fuckin get over being depressed?  This is gonna be a long post!!  It all started with  I joined a group and I was good friends with the group ogranizer.  I met a girl off Cafe Mom and I had invited her to a meetup which was also my first meetup.  We all got along great.  I went to alot of meetups and had a lot of fun.  I made a lot of friends!!  I met with Christina (the girl I met off Cafe Mom) a few times.  I went to her house, we went out to eat, and she even came to my house once.  Everything was going great.  During this time Alyssa was out of school.  When her school started back I couldn't go to as much meetups so I had thought I would start my own group.  I was still gonna go to the other groups meetups, or at least the ones I could make time for but I just wanted something that was more convient for my girls.  I got a call from Emi (the organizer) and she had mentioned that she knew about me starting a group.  She had called because she wanted to ask me if I wanted to be an Organizer.  I told her that I would give my group a few months and if it didn't work out then I would love to be organizer.  After that everything started to fall downhill.  I got an email from Emi saying that I was trying to be sneaky about starting my group.  She said that I could have told her.  I was thinking to myself why do I have to report to her?  Emi also sent the same email to Christina.  During the time things were weird between myself and Emi her son was sick.  Also, I had wrote a post on Cafe Mom saying how I felt and I guess she was offended.  I needed to get it out so I did.  She called me and apologized and said that at the time her son was sick and she was sorry for taking it too far.  Everything was ok, until she saw my post.  I thought she had already seen it, I wasn't trying to hide it.  I did say a few mean things but it wasn't to be like hahaha, I was saying how I felt.  I also forgot to mention that I was still speaking to Christina who told me that I did nothing wrong by starting the group.  She was very supportive and I had thought finally, somebody that I could call a friend.  After Emi saw the post we stopped talking again.  I was on the phone with Christina who said, maybe you should call one of her friends to what was going on with her.  I called one of her friends and told her the situation between myself and Emi.  I do think that I shouldn't have made that call, I should have kept it between me and Emi.  After that things got worse.  Christina who was also in my group left and put as a comment, no time for two groups.  Emi called a few times but only to tell me that I am the one in the wrong.  That I betrayed her as a friend and all this other stuff.  Finally, she never called again.  Christina also stopped talking to me and never responded to my emails.  I know that when Emi sent me and Christina that email, Christina was upset.  She had told me that she didn't know why Emi sent her the email.  Christina said that if Emi was gonna be about drama that she doesn't want anything to do with it.  Emi told her that the reason she sent her that email was because she knew that I was good friends with her so Christina just let it go.  I know it was because she didn't want to feel like I did.  She didn't want to feel weird with Emi.  How fake is that?  There is more but all the details would take forever.  I got an email today from Christina after I had sent her an email.  Here is the email that I sent her and here is the email she sent back. 

 Me: Hi Christina.  I know it's been awhile.  I know that all my other emails you ignored but I am hoping that you will respond to this one.  I would really like to know the reason as to why you stopped talking to me.  I sometimes find myself looking at the group's page and seeing pics and comments and wishing that I was the one in the pic or the one who left a comment.  I know that even though I was the one that made that phone call to Geri, it was still your idea.  I am not trying to start anything, I am just saying how ironic it is that you are with the group that I had started out with.  I wonder if you ever think about how me and the girls are doing.  I still have no idea why you called that day, actually it was your son that called.  I had figured that you deleted my number from your phone.  Please, I would really appreciate an explanation.

Christina: Veronica this is the last email I will ever send to you, you can respond or not, I don't care. I stopped talking to you for many reasons, as did everyone else who stopped talking to you. generally I can't stand negative people and you are one of the most negative people I have ever met. The breaking point for me was when you let your kids steal, I think that you are setting your kids up for a horrible life by letting them do that. I'm in the group still because I don't constantly call people and email people and invade peoples space. I also know the difference between right and wrong. also your first meetup and my first meetup was the same day. and it is an open group, it is not yours or mine, the fact that you continue to say that shows that you have not matured a bit. Oh and by the way calling Geri was YOUR idea, although I should not have tried to be supportive when you called. stop going on the group page, you were kicked out and thats just creepy. I think about your girls all the time, they are amazing and beautiful. yes my son called you by accident, I had forgotten to delete your number I apologize for that. I really was trying to avoid telling you all this because I didn't want to hurt your feelings but it seems like you really want to know.

How fucked up is that?  She never told me the REAL reason why she stopped talking me.  She also added, as did everyone else?  I didn't know that there was more people.  I thought it was between me, Emi, and Christina.  She also never told me how I am negative.  She said that I let my kids steal.  I have before.  Sometimes my kids walk out with candy.  The fucked up part about that is I had ordered Christina an apple ipod or whatever it's called and a navigation system.  When she recieved it, I lied and said to the people that she never got it so that I could get the money back for it.  Christina knew what I was doing which is why I had it sent to her address.  Even though she didn't say it it's fair to say that she said it's ok to steal just as long as your kids don't do it.  Isn't that contradicting what she said about me letting my kids steal?  Then she said that she's in the group because she doesn't call and email people constantly.  WTF?  She is making me seem like a stalker and it's so upseting because she was my fuckin friend!!  I wasn't saying it like it's my group I was trying to make a point that she is in the group that I was in and close friends with Emi.  She said that I haven't matured?  Are you fuckin kidding me?  When she just stopped talking to me alltogether instead of telling me her problems with me, isn't that immature?  To top it all of, she didn't want to hurt my feelings?  Well, great job!!  I still think it has something to do with Emi.  I know it has nothing to do with my kids stealing which by the way never happened because the few times we hung out we were never at a store!!  I feel horrible.  The reason why I told her I look at the page sometimes is because I was making a point to let her know that it hurts to not see in those pics.  To know that the two friends I had are having all this fun as if I never fuckin existed hurts and then she tries to make it look like I am a stalker and that I harrassed people with emails.  The only emails that I sent were to her and Emi about what was going on.  I can't stop this hurting.  I try not to cry but it hurts so bad.  Every fuckin day I try to forget them but I can't.  God, why did this shit happen to me?  I am a sweet person.  As I do have probelms, so does everybody else.  I hate my life.  If it wasn't for my girls, I dunno.



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Jun. 3, 2008 at 11:40 AM Did the last part with the message from Christina just happen? I don't know her very well, but it sounds like being a part of Emi's group is more important to her than losing you as a friend. If that is the case, then forget her, you don't need friends like that in your life! I hope you can find a way to overcome this, you can't let the past control your life, you deserve to be happy, just as anyone else does. It's been a while since all this happened and I think Christina has just moved on, it's been at least 6 months. I'm sure you can find other friends where you live now, are there any mom groups out there?

As for the last part with the ipod, that's horrible, and so very, very wrong. When people steal things, companies drive up prices for products and then honest people like me who want to buy an ipod have to pay a larger amount, and that just isn't fair. I think you were both in the wrong for that, not just you. I hope you aren't teaching your girls that behavior like that is acceptable.

Hope this isn't too harsh! You know I'm always here for you if you need to talk! <3

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Jun. 3, 2008 at 1:28 PM The last part?  You mean in black?  The black writing was me.  The part where it said Christina was her and yeah she sent that email yesterday.  I try to forget, maybe I should try harder.  There is a moms group but I left.  I didn't feel a connection with anyone.  Yes, I know it was wrong.  No, you aren't being harsh, it's the truth.  No I am not teaching my girls that.  Sometimes they walk out with candy and I do know about it but other times I get home and don't know about it.  I have been a lot better about it even if it's just a candy.  I was just saying that Christina was part of stealing and for her to say that I am setting a bad example, even though her kids didn't know she stole, it's still wrong so she had no place telling me about stealing.  Thanks for your comment, I appreciate it.

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