In just seven days from now, you will have been gone 2 years. So much has changed since then. Not how much I love and miss you, though. That will be there forevermore. I just wanted to say some things. Things I should've gotten off my chest before.

   First, I am so sorry that I rarely heeded your advice. YOU knew what was going on with me, and gave me guidance. I always blew you off.

  Second, You were the best friend that I ever had. You always accepted who I was, even if it was not a choice you would have made. I remeber the times we would lay in bed at night, me in my bed and you and yours, and we would talk back and forth about everything.

  Third, I am so syupid. I should not have been pissy when Det invited you to Cars. It was never because of you. It was the money factor, and we were borrowing money just to take the kids, and I, selfishly was worried about you needing us to pay for you. You died THE VERY DAY we were supposed to go. I am a jerk and I know that.

  This whole family is changed and my kids still ask all about you. Det misses you so so much. The ache I feel when I look at my baby girl's face as she hears a song reminding her of you, or when she watches Fox and the Hound.

 I am keeping you alive in Nicholas's heart. I always will, just like you did for me.

  I know I don't bring flowers like I should. I can't bear to go to the grave. I don't feel you there. I feel you in everything I do, but not there.

  People say I am alot like you, and I truly take that as a compliment.

  You loved us kids the best and we never understood. Until now.

  My heart is crushed and I will never be the same.

  Please don't forget to visit my dreams like always. I wish I knew what was up with all the waterparks though.  Okay I am crying really hard now and I can't see.




                                                                      Your baby daughter,







You were the life of the party!!!

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 11:24 PM i know how that feels we just lost my mother in law a week ago and already my kids always say how much they miss her it does not matter how long someone is gone you seem to think about them in everyday life my grandma died 12 years ago she never got to know her great grandkids and almost everyday i seem to talk to her and tell her much i still miss her and i wish she was still here with us.

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Jun. 2, 2008 at 11:29 PM I talk to my mom late at night when I am alone in my car. Cheesy? Yep. Lil bit odd? Sure. Do I care? nope.

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