My oldest, 14-yrs-old. We went to the dr. today and he is 5' 11" tall and 147 #.  Yip. That is my baby boy.  He stands behind me and rests his chin on top of my head.  Today was really hard. I had to let him go on an extended visit with his dad today.  (read my personal journal page--there is a bad history there).  As much as I hate my ex husband I know I have to be the level headed parent that does not keep her son from his dad.  But, man I want to!  No child support, and no he hasn't paid any of our sons bills. But get this; drove up in a brand new Mercedes and they tomorrow for Maui for 12 days. That is where my child support is...  We have been separted since our son was 12 mos. old.  when does this get easier?  It just sucks! He gets to be the good time; rich dad..and then there is me.  I get to disipline and take things away and make him go to bed at a decent hour. What fun am I?  I want to be the fun parent for once.

Last weekend we attended a graduation party for my step-son.  I can sit and talk to his mom for hours with no problem.  I will never be ab le to get along like that with my ex and his wife. There is just too much bad blood.  What am I gonna do when I have grandkids. I will have to wait for them to come visit me...

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