Ok, so this is a long overdue update. I am working another job, the pay actually sorta sucks. I took a $1.50 pay cut, which has hurt me greatly and I am driving farther than before and daycare is gettin ready to go up, ugh ok so enough of that. I have started seeing a man, he's been great so far. We met at work and have alot in common, for the most part. He's 29 and a single dad, I'm 29 and a single mom. He's been married twice. We have been seeing each other for a month now. It's nice to see someone who is ok when I go out and we love to spend time together. He hasn't met Jr yet and I haven't met his son, another thing we have in common. His son is older but named after him, and my son is named after his father. We usuallly take our lunches together so that's been nice, though we've had to cut that cuz it costs to much. It's nice to have a man in my life who doesn't just want one thing, he lives bout 30 minutes away and will drive up just to say hi when he misses me. He drove up the other day when he wasn't able to walk, he has a really bad back injury. But he came up to see me. Ok on to other things. The house has been signed over, he moved the Thing, his cousin, in. Our divorce was final on March 24th for those who don't know yet. It was bittersweet yet I felt free for the first time in my life. I'm still not able to not be angry at him for choosing to be with her, anyone but her. I don't have a choice though. He's not happy, I hear it in his voice, which makes me wonder how abusive he is to her. I'm still working on being happy and have to say Carlos has helped me see a whole new side of life. My family won't approve because he's part hispanic and part black. He's not like any man I've ever known. I think that I'm on a good path for finding the real me and true happiness, not love just happiness. My son is being held back in school, but it's ok, I'd rather have him held back now than later in life. He's had a real tough year bless his heart. He's been a real trooper and I'm so proud of how he's taken all these changes. It's gonna take some time but he will get used to all these changes. The hardest it seems is when daddy put someone in his spot in daddy's bed. That hurt him alot and he wants her out. Without me saying anything. They are living like a married couple and it seems like he's putting her above my son, which pisses me off. Noone comes before my son. Thats what I like about seeing a single dad, he feels the same that I do, noone comes before our children.  So that's the basic update I know I'm not on as much as I thought I'd be but I am so tired from answering the phones that I get so tired I come home and do what I have to do  and  then go to bed. Yes talking on the phone is what I do. I love the people I work with, it's alot better than having to be scared of losing my job and knowing ppl don't like me. I miss you all!

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Jun. 4, 2008 at 11:14 AM I'm glad things are finally pulling together for you!  Keep at it, you will find the happiness you so deserve~

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Jun. 11, 2008 at 11:02 PM Keep your chin up!  Just remember that "she" (you're much nicer than I was by calling her she!) will have to go through the same things you did.  No matter how much they say they have changed, they just want you to feel like you lost out on something great from them, which was all the lies and the "happy face" they put on is just another lie.  Keep your focus on you and letting go of the anger.  It's much easier said than done!

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