An Unethical Adoption?

[casjoh]

If you take a journey around cafemom and you happen upon a newly created group dealing with adoption, I ask strongly that you take a good, long look at the purpose for the group.  If it is a group created solely for the moms of pregnant teenagers to come together and discuss the "greatness" of adoption in attempts to push their daughters in that direction, please run the other way.

No women, no matter her age, should ever be forced or coerced into losing her child to adoption.  This is wrong on every level and should not even be allowed in my opinion.  I for one wish this group was restricted from even existing since it's main purpose is one of such a disgusting nature.

If you are a couple hoping to adopt, please keep in mind, by creating such a relationship with mothers who wish to force their daughters into losing their children to adoption, you are, essentially condoning that mother's should have the right to force such a terrible grief and loss on their child.

 Nobody should EVER have such decisions forced on them, whether it is to adopt or parent their unborn baby.  Young, pregnant moms deserve information, truth of experience, and support in whatever they choose.  To not give them this is to fail them. 

Please, if any of the hopeful couples out there see this as an opportunity to adopt a child by joining this group and forming "relationships" with mothers who want to force their daughters into adoption, step back and take a long hard look at the true ramifications of this.  It isn't right.  It isn't ethical.  And the baby you may  be hopeful for will have come to you in all the wrong ways and for all the wrong reasons.

I truly hope, even as some of us ladies have debated on opposite sides here within cafemom, we can stand together against this and agree no woman should ever be put in such a position by anyone!

Tags: adoption, adoptive parents, pregnant teens

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[mnmommy1]

Jun. 29, 2008 at 2:48 PM I agree with you 100% !!!!  What group are you talking about, havent seen it yet.

[orangeorbie]

Jul. 24, 2008 at 1:05 AM

Quoting momzilla

"sooner or later those daughters will wake up and realize just what their mothers did to them, and then the mother WILL lose her daughter permanently."

My mother coerced her own daughter to give up her own  daughter.  "Don't put your name in the paper" (as I'm leaving for the hospital to give birth)  "I think you should go to the hospital 30 minutes away to deliver.  For your own protection."  (She means her precious reputation!  I didn't care who and their mother knew about me)  "They seem so ready." (about the paps who stole my baby)  "So it's my fault you got pregnant?!" (after I hadn't talked to her in weeks. BTW I never once complained about getting pregnant.  No, b****, it's your fault you pressured me into giving away my firstborn!) "What you're doing must be so rewarding." (to the wife of the adoption attorney who wouldn't give me my baby back after 2 days)

I could go on and on.  But unfortunately it sounds like my situation is common.  Shame on these parents!Getting rid of their own GRANDCHILD to save a reputation.  I hope they burn for it.  Because the pain their daughters feel is an inescapable HELL!!!!

I have not talked to my parents since March 7.  Momzilla, I want to be forgiving, but I just can't in this case.  I don't ever want to see them again.  Each time my mom says, "let's have lunch."  I want to say, "when I get to have lunch with my daughter is when you'll have lunch with yours." 

My mouth is clenched.  Sick.  SICK.