Same Crap Different Day

[Sariah5-6-07]

well so far today it's been the same stuff for a year I lost my Little Girl 5-9-2007 due to premature birth.But the more I think about it and the more people tell me I had her for 3 days and it was the best 3 days of my life.I got to touch her and talk to her.I got the part of my heart that was missing something filled.Now there's another empty hole missing her more and more everyday.I look at pictures so I don't forget what she looked like and I have her clothes and the stuff that was with her.I never got to see the color of my daughters eyes and that hurts I'm always wondering what color they would have been and what a wonderful little girl she would have turned out to be.I know you guys probably don't like hearing this but it's how I feel and I know the pain of losing a child It's the hardest most painful thing i have ever had to. I had to watch them put my little girl in that cold and lonely ground.There's thoughts that go Thur my head that I can't stop. I don't understand the meaning of life anymore. I know people die.But why little innocent helpless babies that didn't do anything wrong.Why do they have to suffer. well thats all thats in my head right now

[madsgrandma]

Jun. 13, 2008 at 9:08 PM Honey you are entitled to say and feel anything you want. That is traumatic and you can grieve. YOu should grieve if that is what feels right to you.  That is horrible and it is normal to question why? Your little gril would have been lucky to of had a mom that loved her so much. Just no that you have a beautiful angel watching out for you and remember her soul is with you, her body may be in the ground but her sole is with you and god!!!!  No one can take that from you. I wish the best for you, but becareful of depression, it can take over your life without you even realizing it. You have been blessed with an angel and maybe someday you can feel that. Give it time, you will never forget her even though deep down you probably are afraid that you will, so by grieving you are keeping her alive, but someday remember her, love her, but let her go!!!!!

[jenibean]

Jun. 20, 2008 at 5:19 PM I came across the pic of your beautiful girl when I was putting a picture on the site of my own little girl. Her name is Grace. She has that name for a reason. I was only planning on having two kids. When I had my girl and my boy I was done but God had different plans. He took my little boy to be with him. Casey was only 2 yrs old when he died and I asked the question a million times, why? Less than 2 yrs later I had a premature labor and lost another son. Zechariah was with us for only 1 day. I never even got to hold him until he was gone. To live in the regret only makes it harder. I understand how you feel, lost empty, alone. It doesn't ever stop hurting. It just hurts a little less. Casey has been gone 6 1/2 years now and Zechariah 5. Not one day goes by that I don't think about them and talk to them. On August 31, 2005 my daughter Grace was born. Her name is Grace because it is only by God's grace that she is even here! His plan involves alot more thought and planning than I could ever imagine. I hope you have the support you need. If not, I'm Jeni...   [e-mail]