Sister (Pretty Long Sorry)

[tnt2201]

     My sister and I are 4 years apart (she is the eldest).  When we were kids there was always a competition between us over just about everything.  As we got older I thought we got past all of that.  We even had a very long painful conversation about it several years back.

     Our lives started to go in different directions.  

     HER HISTORY:  She went off to college to be a M.D., no an Optometrist, no wait a Researcher, and again a Translator, or maybe a Message Therapist.  you get the idea.  Then she met her husband.  He is mining engineer for a huge copper mine.  She of course quit school immediately.  They moved to Indonesia for 5 years, had two girls and I missed her dearly.  They moved back and to Louisiana until the last hurricane.  The company her husband works for closed that office and relocated to Phoenix.  That is when our relationship took a turn.

     MY HISTORY:  I got married right out of high school and started my family right after.  I work while my husband did not.  We divorced when my son was 7 months old.  I was single until my son was two.  I supported myself but just getting by.  My current husband was young when I met him but he stepped up to plate and took his best shot.  He hit it out of the park!!!

     THE PROBLEM:  Since my sister moved to AZ she has turned into this catty, materialistic, snob.  Her husband makes a ton of money.  His bonus is more than I make in 8 years and she just had to tell me about it.  She has put in a pool complete with water falls, slides, and a fast lane.  She has done wonderful landscaping, wet bar, outdoor kitchen,etc.  Basically, her backyard is an island oasis.  I WAS happy for her up until the last month or two.  Now I don't even want to talk to her.

     She will call me and complain about her girls friends parents.  They want to have a play date or a cook out or something and she gets mad because they want to do it at there own house instead of at hers.  I quote, "My backyard is so much better than theirs, I just don't understand why they don't want to come here."  She makes fun of people that don't have what she has!  She called one time laughing after she left one mothers house who just had a pool put in and she said, "Well it's just a big square hole in the ground."

     I know she isn't talking about me specifically when she says these things but I can help but think she is taking a stab at me every time.  She has made comments like, why don't you just buy this or that? or can't you hire someone to do that for you? or my all time fave, I only paid $5000.00 for that you could go get one.  Are you kidding me??  $5000.00 is a car when my son turns 16.  We are not poor by any stretch but we don't have that kind of "play money".

     I have spoken to my mother and father about it and they tried to make me feel better but they are family.  They both told me basically the same thing.  My husband and I worked hard for everything we have, she just married it.  Intellectually I know this but emotionally it still hurts.  I want to talk to her about it but she is one of those people that has an argument for everything and is NEVER wrong.  I just don't know how to handle this...advice???