I feel like my husband is being so unsupportive...

[Mrs.Simms]

Ok, normally...richard is the kindest funniest man ever. hes patient and wonderful and i cant believe he puts up with my attitude when im NOT pregnant let alone now that i am.

 just last night he came home from work at 3 am and didnt say one word to me. usually he gently wakes me up and gives me a kiss...and then cuddles up to me and we fall asleep together. well, i woke up on my own to him lying there and i asked why he didnt wake me up and he at first said because i was so dead asleep and then proceeded to add "that, and im really quite irritated with you right now". yeah...not gonna lie. i was a little hurt. i asked why and he said "i keep telling you not to leave dirty dishes out and you always do"

keep in mind morning sickness has had me bedwridden for several days now and sitting up makes me sick let alone standing. so i was lucky i could stand long enough to make soup. AND he always says how hungry he is when he gets home so i left enough in the pan for him to have when he got home. dishes are also his job in the house (at his request) and they were piled up in the sink so i really had no room to even PUT a dirty dish in the sink in the first place.

 i could really go on forever but just to sum this up at the end of a work day, i just feel so stressed. he is really putting a lot of little bullshit on my shoulders these days and its adding up big time. to top it all off, im sick for 15 hours straight, throwing up on cue every 30 minutes and so my whole body is sore and the next morning im in the hospital getting pumped with IV fluid and i ask him to rub my back and he whines and says no and falls asleep...after getting a full nights rest when i was up all night dealing with this little parasite inside me.

 i just feel like he has no compassion and is just going to leave me to deal with this pregnancy alone with no help or support. its so frustrating, i just wish he would grow up!

[RockinNJ]

Jul. 13, 2008 at 4:08 PM

He'll come around eventually.  I've seen this happen with a lot of new expecting fathers.  He's honestly no different.  It's change, and unfortunately it sounds like he does not like change. 

I'm not making excuses for him, he should be more supportive, but this is all so new for the both of you!

Keep your head up, and don't worry!

[working-momma]

Jul. 13, 2008 at 7:36 PM

Try getting some books from the book store that can help prepare him for what's to come. Things that are going on with you, the unborn baby, his changes in feelings. Just so that he knows that  you aren't the only one that feels like this during your pregnancy. They have some great books out for the guys now. You should get one as well. Just to help let you know that you aren't alone either.

As for your feelings being hurt, I'm sorry. He'll come around. He's probably still freaked out about the idea that he's gonna be a dad as well. Not to say that you aren't possibly scared. Men just deal with things oddly sometimes.

Let me know if you want someone to vent too. I'm all ears cause I've been there before.

Sandra

[sahmof3]

Jul. 22, 2008 at 12:50 PM

I understand that this is new to you both.  Morning sickness can be rough.  I know, I lost 15 lbs at first.  I couldn't do much.  Now, as a mom of 3 kids, ask your doctor to put you on something to help with the sickness.  Eat ginger snaps and stuff like that.  You have to look at it from his aspect.  He is freaking out and is taking it out on you and thats not fair to you both. He will come around, but sometimes you have to do some of his chores too.  This is a 2 way street and you both have to sit down and talk about what is happening and how to be more supportive on both ends.

[gogetem]

Jan. 26, 2009 at 3:02 PM

This reminds me ALL TOO WELL of something my husband said to me a couple days ago.   Girl, I feel your pain.  It definitely magnifies things, too, when you're pregnant.  I feel like blurbing out a lot of vulgar words concerning men right now.  but I've decided to keep things G-rated.  LOL