getting tired of it all

[chamaham]

It seems to be that I'm expected to perform like 3 people and always have enough time and energy and never be tired or upset.  Everyone expects me to be superwoman and I have had enough of it!!  Not only am I raising my 2 children without their father's help, but now I have to be responsible for my mom too!  She's 50 years old, but cannot seem to grasp the concept that you cannot spend money that you don't have!!  She's been constantly overdrawn and I have to pay her bills or let her utilities be shut off.  I might be tempted to let her do without, except that she is my babysitter, so I can't let my kids be in a place without power.  But I can barely manage to keep my bills paid, so how am I supposed to pay hers too?  I wish I could just take that stupid checkbook away from her!!!  She never even tries to balance it, and of course that's my fault cause she's always watching my kids and they won't let her, and they steal her bills.  Excuse me!!  Since when is it a 3 year old's fault that you can't put your bills in one place and balance your checkbook in the morning before they come over??  And she gets upset that I don't have enough money to get her what she wants and help cover her mistakes, but yet she gets upset that I'm getting a second job for some extra income.  She can't have it both ways.  Then she complains that she doesn't have a life cause she's always babysitting, but when I start to arrange for other care she throws a fit that if I do that she'll never see them.  Hello, what do you want me to do?  Either you watch them or you don't--just make up your mind if you even have one left in that immature little head of yours.  But at least this second job will only be for 3 or 4 nights a week and will provide enough to fill in the holes in my budget and still leave me with some extra cash every month.  Now if my car will hold out I'm in good shape.  I already had to replace a car once this year, don't want to have to do it again.  anyway, guess i'm done complaining for now.  I just get sick and tired of everyone expecting me to be perfect when I can't be.  Time to go home and get ready for work now, oh joy.