Confessions of a Breastfeeding Mom, revisited: Nursing in Public and Nursing Toddlers

[asherraifsmom]

I wrote this journal entry last year, when my son was itty bitty, and I think the information is still pertinent so I"m reposting it, hoping others will read it who haven't before. If you're on my friends list and already read it, its the same article, with a few sidenotes added to the very end (after the asterisks) so unless you're really bored, no need to read again. If you HAVENT read it before, please read on:

Confessions of a Breastfeeding Mom (part 1)

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edit: My son is now almost 14 months old and still nursing like a champ. Since this was written I've also gotten some ridiculous comments about extended breastfeeding, or nursing past one year. I'd like to dispel some of those as well:

"It's child abuse"--no, child abuse is refusing your child the perfect food before they have all their teeth in and the ability to properly digest a well balanced meal due to that fact, simpy because ignorant people think its gross or disturbing.  The World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding until AT LEAST 2 and then as long a mom and baby are happy with it. Many children in other parts of the world (and no,NOT just in third world countries where they're "required" to because of poverty...in most of Europe as well...) breastfeed til five years old, but 2-3 years is even more common. Interestingly enough, it is between 2-3 years that most children get in all their first set of teeth. How do we expect children to get a well balanced diet when they dont have any canine teeth or molars yet with which to crush and tear apart very fibrous, tough vegetables as well as meats? The only options are mushing up all their food, which is a pain, and not natural (what do yout hink people did before food mills were invented??), only feeding them soft foods which leads to an unbalanced diet full of lots of sugar, mainly (ripe fruits, hot cereals...), or switching them to formula...a child should NEVER HAVE to be on formula. Yes, some do, for medical reasons. But it is NOT BENEFICIAL, healthwise, to give a child formula at any point, when the alternative is breastmilk.

"If the child is old enough to pull up your shirt, say boob, milk, etc, they're too old.." This excuse really chaps my hide. My son was saying distinguishable words at 6 months old, and lifting up my shirt. Before a year, he could undo the flap on my nursing bra if i let him work at it long enough. Does this then mean I should go AGAINST the instructions of the World Health Organization AND the American Academy of Pediatrics when it comes to breastfeeding because my son is an early talker?? Completely ridiculous. No different than me telling a formula feeding mom that when the child is old enough to say "bottle" or "ba ba"...that child should no longer be able to have formula...It just makes no sense. There is absolutely no connection between the two.

"It's gross". Gross is relative, and in the eyes of the beholder. One person thinks its gross, one thinks its beautiful, and still another doesn't even think about it because its as normal as waking up in the morning. Who is right? WHo gets to decide what the laws should be on this issue? You cannot go off of someone's opinion of it being "gross".... because it is all relative. You can only go off of what is scientifically proven to be most beneficial to achild, and whether or not it is discrimination to stop a woman from nursing in public or nusing a toddler. (and yes, in most of the nation, it is a LEGALLY PROTECTED RIGHT TO NURSE IN PUBLIC A BABY OR TODDLER WITH OR WIHTOUT ANY COVERING AT ALL) Also, there are people in this country who think that interracial couples are "gross", that piercings are "gross", that people with weight problems are "gross"...Should we then ban all interracial couples, those with piercings, and those overweight from ever being allowed to go out in public??? It goes against everything our country stands for to assume so. Nursing in public or nursing a toddler is no different.

As for a natural age of weaning, check out the following link:

www.kathydettwyler.org/detwean.html

[doulala]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 11:45 AM

Well said, great points.

Thanks for sharing your story & the info. 

I love to really examine what is "normal" and "right" and "natural" when I make my parenting decisions.  Usually the answer of what is best is the same as what is most natural & what has been done for centuries.

Thank you!!!  :-)

[coolmommyof3]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 11:46 AM

Well said!!  I too have struggled with ALL that you just explained.  All of us BF mamas do!  It is well worth the reading.  I feel like you just said my story.  My dd is almost 3, and we still bond with nursing.  I'm sure I'll get grief from others online, but I really don't care because she is happy, I'm happy, and I know that I'm doing the best for her.  Thank you for "reading my mind"....Great post!

[Oliviasmommy131]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 11:46 AM

I also nurse my 14 month old. I feel so good knowing I am giving her the best start in life.

It's sad that some women can't support you for doing something different than they do.

I support those that chose not to breastfeed, so why don't I deserve the same respect. Great journal.

[mereksmommy]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 11:48 AM

I loved this!!!! Thank you. I am still breastfeding my 15 month old and he will stop whenever he is ready!

[unique_puzzle]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 11:48 AM

Great post!  I agree whole heartedly.  I also have a journal about "extended" nursing on my page. 

[riotgrrl]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 11:50 AM

Great post!

[asherraifsmom]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 11:50 AM

thanks for reading. LOL i just realized, reading this again, that i say "first off" a LOT...lol...i'm thinking of editing it and making it a proper article, not just an impromptu blog entry, and send it in to various parenting magazines...

(Original Poster)

[Cassidhes_Mom]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 12:26 PM

Awesome post. Breasts have become so sexualized in this country that folks don't realize that this--that BREASTFEEDING--is what they were intended for. Any other use is just a pleasant side effect :)

[catholicmamamia]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 12:35 PM

AMEN.
Great post, Heather!

[SnoozeButton]

Jul. 31, 2008 at 12:46 PM

Well said.  I definitely think you should make this into an article.  I agree with Cassidhes_Mom that breast have become too sexualized in our society. 

Voted popular.  :)