Hes using tears to try and get me back. (some language)Sorry its long

[SYSTERANGEL2]

MY STBX IS USING HIS TEARS TO TRY AND GET ME HOME SOONER.  HE STARTS CRYING AFTER HE TELLS ME THAT HIS MOM TOLD HIM, "THAT IF I DON'T OPEN MY MOUTH AND START GIVING HER ATTITUDE THEN I CAN LIVE WITH HER, BUT IF I START TO GET AN ATTITUDE WITH HER BOTH ME AND MY HUSBAND ARE OUT ON THE STREETS.  SHE CAN GIVE ATTITUDE, BUT SHE CAN'T TAKE IT WHEN I DISH IT RIGHT BACK AT HER."  I'M SITTING ON THE PHONE WITH HIM THINKING WTF?! DOES THIS MEAN THAT I HAVE TO GO BACK TO BEING HER PERSONAL SLAVE WHILE MY HUSBAND WORKS?!  I LOVE BEING WITH MY KIDS, MY MIL HAS CUSTODY OF THEM IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY MY MIL HAS CUSTODY OF MY KIDS PLEASE REFER TO MY ( THIS IS MY STORY) IN MY JOURNAL.  HIS MOM HAS ALMOST HIT ME TWICE.  SHE IS ALOT BIGGER THAN ME, MORE POWERFUL IS WHAT I MEAN.  "I HAVE TO PROVE TO HER THAT I'VE CHANGED." IS ALSO WHAT SHE TOLD HIM.  SO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN TO ME YOU WONDER?  THIS MEAN THAT HER HOUSE MUST NOT LOOKED EVEN REMOTELY LIVED IN, FOR HER TO FEEL COMFORTABLE IN HER HOUSE. 

 HERE IS A NORMAL DAY FOR MY MIL SHE GETS UP AND GOES TO WORK, SHE COMES HOME FROM WORK AND GOES TO HER ROOM AND STAYS THERE UNTIL SHE GOES TO BED AND THEN REPEATS THE ENTIRE PROCESS OVER THE NEXT DAY.  MEANWHILE  SHE WILL KNOCK ON THE WALL FOR A FAMILY MEMBER TO DO HER EVERY LITTLE BIDDING.  WHEN I WAS LIVING WITH HER, HERE WAS THE PEOPLE WHO GOT THERE FOOD BEFORE ME.  MY MIL,MY 3  KIDS,, MY HUSBAND, MY BIL, MY SIL, MY SIL'S BOYFRIEND,OUR ROOMMATE TRACY HAD TO HAVE A PLATE SET UP FOR HIM SO HE COULD EAT WHEN HE GOT HOME FROM WORK OR SCHOOL AND THEN IF THERE WAS ANYTHING LEFT I FINALLY GOT TO EAT, IF SHE DIDN'T WANT SECONDS BEFORE I COULD EVEN SIT DOWN TO EAT.  IF SHE SAW ME MAKE MYSELF A SANDWHICH OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT I WAS EATING HER OUT OF HOUSE AND HOME.  SHE HAD FOUR GROWN MEN LIVING THERE TO, BUT I WAWS ALWAYS THE BAD GUY FOR EVERYONE TO BLAME.  I FINALLY PUT MY FOOT DOWN WHEN MY MIL BLAMED ME FOR MY BIL DROPPING OUT OF COLLEGE.  

 I'M JUST SO SCARED THAT WHEN I DO END UP GOING BACK MY MIL WILL WAIT UNTIL THE RIGHT MOMENT, PUSH THE RIGHT BUTTON TO GET ME TO SNAP AND THEN I WILL BE  HURT BY HER.  SHES THREATENED ME THAT IF I DON'T DO WHAT SHE WANTS ME TO DO SHE WILL TAKE MY KIDS AND LEAVE ME BEHIND TO WHERE I'LL NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN. 

SORRY THIS IS SO LONG AND THANKS IF YOU READ THE WHOLE THING.

[NdAppy]

Aug. 5, 2008 at 8:24 PM

Do NOT go back. Get your life together. Get a good job and a good place to live and then get a good lawyer and get your kids back.

[butterflymom13]

Aug. 5, 2008 at 8:34 PM

I agree with NdAppy don't take chances in going back to her and get your life back on track. With God's help it can happen. Stay strong and have faith.

Love Your Friend,
Julia

[gabrielle_x]

Aug. 5, 2008 at 10:04 PM

Omg!! Rhonda, I wish I was a lawyer..I would work tooth and nail for you to get your kids where they belong..and I mean that.

[bugsandpirates]

Aug. 5, 2008 at 10:11 PM

You absolutely are NOT to go back in that house!  I did not read your post (on the children) but under no circumstances are you to allow that type of emotional and mental abuse on yourself.  You are NOT to go back into that house.  Get yourself together first, then fight for your kids (if you can).

Good Luck - Remember, she can only treat you like a slave, if you allow it.

[DestinysChild46]

Aug. 7, 2008 at 4:47 AM

     

I agree you need to stay away from all that dysfunction,it is unhealthy for you all. You  do not deserve to be treated that way ever ! STAY OUT! Even if you have to stay with a friend or a shelter it is better then allowing yourselfs to be treated pooorly,Always remember if you do not stand up for yourself and kids who will . What are you teaching them ? That it is okay to be treated that way ?You will be starting another generation of ABUSE ! Is that the legacy you want to leave your kids??

.                                               STAY OUT GIRL !

                                                     Selina

[NeimaAngel]

Aug. 8, 2008 at 1:38 AM

I would agree that you should NOT go back... I am having a hard time finding the information on why/how she got custody of the kids, but the bottom line is she is abusive, and you need to stay away from her.  Feel free to PM me if you would like to talk further about the cycle of violence, and the root of abuse: power and control.

You come first. Stay Safe,

NeimaAngel