The girl who runs to run...

[darkroomchic]

I've decided to face the facts: I've gotten fat.  Somehow, even though it really is on my mind a lot,  it's pretty easy to ignore most of the time.  Occasionally, I'll think about how I really need to do something about it but quickly sweep it under the rug.  I sneak out of rooms when people have a camera and avoid ever looking at the ones I am in.  I try hard not to go clothes shopping because I don't want to admit I'm a size 18.  I never wear skirts because it's incredibly uncomfortable to have your legs chaffe all day.  I can't remember the last pair of sexy underwear I've owned because they ride up in my butt.  I don't own any pants or shorts that go higher than the bottom of my knees because I can't stand my thighs.  So when you are all covered up, I guess it's pretty easy to ignore.  So here goes.....I'm facing it:

I'm 30, I'm 5'5'', I wear a size 18, and I weigh 208 pounds. 

Gosh, sounds pretty awful.  But you know what.....I have also decided to not let that define me.  There are also some pretty amazing things about me.  I am a mom.  I am smart.  I am funny.  I am an amateur photographer.  I have a fantastic family.  I have incredible friends.  I can outsmart a 2 year old some of the time (which I think is a HUGE accomplishment!).  And now thanks to the Couch to 5k program, I can run for a full 60 seconds.  A whole minute??  I know it may sound lame to some people, but to me it is pretty darn cool.  I can actually run 60 seconds eight times in less than a half an hour.  And pretty soon, I'll be running 90 seconds at a time.  And then two minutes, and then.....

I have also found the 5k race I want to be my first.  It is called the Annual Turkey Trot and is the Saturday before Thanksgiving.  It is a very casual race and not really based on best time.  Before the race, you predict what your time will be.  They then take the longest time and run the clock backwards from there.  The start is staggered so that if everyone were to predict correctly (even though this never happens) everyone would finish at the same time!!!!  So I'll actually never really know how many people were faster than me.  I love it!  Guess what you win if you predict your finish time closest....a TURKEY!!!  This sounds like so much fun! 

So here's to the fat girl who's running for a turkey!!!! 

And after a while, I'll be the girl who runs to run. 

 

[forsaken1216]

Aug. 6, 2008 at 11:50 PM

Good Luck!!!

[katemn]

Aug. 7, 2008 at 3:31 AM

Awesome!!  You write so well.  They talked about the Turkey Trot at the Durango tri and now I know what it is! That sounds so hilariously fun.   I'm still struggling to run (jog) a full 5k.   I have to keep doing squats to prevent my knees from hurting.   I'm so very excited for you.   I can't wait to hear about your progress.  That day is going to come when you just...keep running.  Maybe it will for me, too! 

[LitningBug]

Aug. 7, 2008 at 11:37 PM

I love what you wrote. There are so many wonderful things about you that have nothing to do with weight.  Here I will add just a few: you are so fun to be around, i never feel like i have to act or be someone else around you you accept me for who i am.  you are trustworthy and very go with the flow and have a beautiful personality. you aren't afraid to be a dork with me! I love being your friend and am so blessed that you are mine.

I really hope that this works out for you.  Good luck you have my full support! Go get that turkey!!

[darkroomchic]

Aug. 8, 2008 at 9:59 AM

Thank you so much for the encouragement you guys!  And thanks for your wonderfully kind words, Bug. :) 

(Original Poster)