The Adoption Irony

[Momzilla4]

 "In order to drive a car you must be of a certain age, to drink you must be a certain age, to have your own credit card or even your own bank account without parent signatures you must be a certain age - yet government allows very young vulnerable single mothers to sign a legally-binding document handing over their own flesh-and-blood, another human life, to complete strangers." - Claudia Ganzon, 2004.

quoted from the Origins Canada homepage at http://www.originscanada.org/

[onethentwins]

Aug. 14, 2008 at 7:09 PM

I've often wondered about that. If minors can't sign contracts, how are these adoptions legal? On the other hand, If her parents signature was what was needed, wouldn't that mean that she herself had no rights at all, only her parents?

[Momzilla4]

Aug. 14, 2008 at 9:04 PM

How it works is that adoption does not fall under contract law, but under adminstrative law.  That is how they get away with it.  In many states you need a parent's signature ot get an abortion, but not to surrender your baby.  Why?  Because the adoption industry does not want parents to interfere with them getting the goods.

(Original Poster)

[casjoh]

Aug. 14, 2008 at 9:48 PM

I've wondered too about the other side - if a parent could then force their child to surrender.  But, for me, this strikes very close to home since I was sixteen when I lost my son and I can look back now and see how very naive I was back then and how trusting I was in the "adults" who were telling me what was the best thing to do so that I wouldn't destroy my son's life or burden my parents if my decision was to keep him.

For my situation, if my parents would have had to sign, my mom would have refused and I would have never lost my son.  But back then she didnt' have a clue what was happening during the meeting with my so-called adoption counselor.  And that counselor was working very well with me to make sure I didn't ask my mom for help.

I think the laws protecting those under eighteen are there, partly, because it is too easy for an adult to take advantage of a minor.  For me, they knew exactly where to hit.  Their "counseling" varied from letting me know how selfish and cruel I would be to ask my parents to help to making sure I understood how my parents just weren't understanding me and my decision if they tried to talk me out of the adoption.  They played on the guilt of a child and the rebellion of a teenager.  And did it very, very well.

My mom was - and still is - my greatest champion.  I wish, more than anything, she had been a part of my meetings with the counselor and my son's aparents.  I wish I would have been wise enough to count on her then as I always had and have since.  But, the adoption industry, does make sure to cut that security if they feel it is a threat in any way.