The oddest thing is happening. The more I'm getting to know my son's quirks, the more I'm getting to know my husband. Seriously, I thought he was just making excuses for the way he is, but I don't really think he is. My son is awaiting a visit to a developmental pediatrician. I'm expecting a diagnosis of autism for him. Sometimes I see progress, and then I'm not sure. I DO know this for sure though: my son has some serious sensory issues! He flaps his hands when he's excited or frustrated. He has a tendency to withdraw from people. He's not really a very social little boy. Now, I know that my husband's family (especially his dad's side) has some OCD. My father-in-law hates getting sticky stuff on his hands. So does my son. They are particular about how things are.

So back to my husband. I discovered recently that my husband used to flap his hands when he was a little boy. He was teased about it, so he probably learned to control it. My husband is not a very social person. Actually, he'd rather stay at home and watch tv than go out with friends. He has a few close friends from high school  and more casual aquaintances. He can't stand going into Wal-Mart or anywhere with a lot of people. Parties are usually out. Oh, yeah, and he wrings his hands terribly! It drives me nuts! As far as I know, he didn't have any major developmental delays when he was a kid. Otherwise, these other issues probably would have been addressed. Plus, he grew up in the 60's when not much was probably known about sensory problems.

I look at my son, and I see so much of my husband in him. I seriously think it's beyond just being a typical boy. When we go to a park, all he wants to do is swing. He'll stay on the swing for 20 minutes or more. Today I took the kids to the park, and James went right to the baby swings. After almost 15 minutes, I got him out and asked him if he wanted to do something else. He ran right down to the "big kid" swings and wanted to swing some more. He didn't even notice the two little boys who had just gotten to the park. Other times, if he will tear himself away from the swings, he loves to go down the slides.

I just find it all ironic as I learn about different sensory disorders and autism, how I'm realizing that my husband really can't help the way he is and feels. I feel like maybe I understand him a little better, and maybe I can try to not get so annoyed with certain behaviors. I don't know. We'll see.

Tags: sensory dysfunction, autism, husband

Add A Comment