My hands are tied.

[kim8901]

I don't know what to do.. I recently got out of an unhealthy 8 yr relationship. I moved into my parents house with my son. My mom and I have been fighting terribly lately.  This is how it started... When I moved in..I lined up rides for my son for school this year. My dad was going to take him on his 2 days off of work. My sister was gonna take him one or two days, and his dad was gonna take him one or two days a week.. And I would be able to pick him up most days. My sister and I work for the same company but at different stores. My mom told my sister to talk to my boss about getting me transfered so my hours could change so I could bring my son to school. I had told my mom previously that it wasn't an option because I am store manager at this location.  So then she tells me that I have to go stay the night as my ex's house on Mondays and Tuesday so my dad don't have to bring my son to school.. We were fighting so bad...that I went to my ex's house as she wished..and he does not clean..the house was a terrible mess. So I was cleaning it...She called the police and had them come to my ex's house(used to be my house too) and told the police that my son was living in unlivable conditions. My son is autistic.. and he depends on me. The police came..and yes the house was a big mess that I was cleaning.. The officer told me that he had every right to take my son but he wouldn't cause I wasn't living there. When I think about the fear and the loss that my son would have went through. Oh my god...I can't imagine losing him. He would be lost with out me...I would be lost with out him. I can't imagine him being so scared, so lost, so hurt with out his momma. I'm all he has..and he is all I have. I don't want to live at my ex house. But I have no choice right now. How could I go back to that house where she lives, and live under that roof knowing what she almost did to my son, and me.  How do you forgive someone for something like that. She pretty much set me up... she knew I had to stay there for the night and she called the cops and told them I lived there... How could she do that to me?.. My son is very well taken care of, not abused in any way... Teachers and everyone loves him and constantly tells me how good of a mom I am... Yes, some times I raise my voice to him, and do put him in time out... but other than that he is a great polite kid. My parents basically told me that I am a bad parent. I'm going through an emotional rollercoaster right now with the break up, with school, finances, working...So yes sometimes I am irritated. Everything I do is for my son.  I don't want to live at my old house, I really want to be at my parents house where I have started a new life, but I can't knowing what she has done. My hands are tied, I'm stuck in a place I don't want to be at. I guess all I can do is clean it and make the best of it. I feel so stuck and I feel that I'm gonna fall back into that deep depression I was in.. Please what should I do? Any advice would be appreciated.

[EmmaKerrimom]

Aug. 21, 2008 at 10:54 PM

Wow that has got to be hard.. I don't know if I could ever forgive someone for that.. and your mom... wow.  As for what to do get your own place.  I know it seems impossible, and I don't know where you live but I know some area's have horrable high houses/rent costs but it really seems like getting your own place needs to be first on the list.  Even if it's just a one bedroom apartment for now you can always give the room to your son and sleep on the couch.  Another option would be low-rent houseing.. I don't know if you'd qualify for something like that but it's worth a shot to find out.  Most importantly you have to believe that you can.. and you will!  O and you might want to see if their is any before care services at your son's school!