I have been a mother for thirteen years. And over these many years I have carried on a secret nightlife--entered a world that my husband has never been a part of. Yes, he is clueless...

Last night was one of those nights. In the hours of darkness a voice called out to me. "Mommmmmmmmmmm!"  The hoarse cry mingled with a wet gagging sound. I immediately jumped out of my bed trying to rid my body of the sleepy haze that still desperately tried to cling to me. Even though my mind was not fully awake, my body reacted to this nighttime intruder. I ran on autopilot-my feet stepping through a wet trail leading to the bathroom-all too familiar.

Yes, I was living Mommy déjà vu.  

My son was sick. The remnants of his ailment covered a mass area-many rooms. If there was an Olympic event for distance puking he would now be proudly wearing a gold medal. I cleaned, I comforted. I cleaned some more. I had to wake my healthy son who had the misfortune of sleeping next to his ailing brother and was now also covered in chunks of goo. My already mountainous laundry pile was growing by leaps and bounds.

From 2:00 AM -5:15 AM I was on full red alert-cleaning-comforting-comforting-cleaning... I finally crawled back into bed, eyes glazed over, and the smell of cleaning products and puke permeating from my entire being. I at last closed my eyes, praying that we had a reprieve. At 5:30 AM my husband's alarm clock rang. He turned off the blaring buzzer, wrapped his arms around me and...wink-wink-nudge-nudge.

I DON'T THINK SO MISTER! My voice sounded slightly possessed.

My husband was completely baffled as to why his wife could be so grumpy. "It must be that time of the month..." he mumbled as he crawled out of bed and headed to the bathroom.

And my secret nightlife remains a secret...

Tags: funny, mom, night, sick kid, sleeping husband

Add A Comment