Things I Have Learned About Being A Texan......

[firemans_wife]

    *1**. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the
    road.***

    **2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in Texas .**

    **3. There are 10,000 types of spiders.  All 10,000 of them live in
    Texas **

    **4. If it grows, it'll stick ya.  If it crawls, it'll bite cha.**

    **5. 'Onced' and 'Twiced' are words.**

    **6. It is not a shopping cart, it's a buggy.***

         *7. 'Jaw-P?' means, 'Did y'all go to the bathroom?

    8. People actually grow and eat okra.

    9. 'Fixinto' is one word.

    10. There is no such thing as 'lunch.' There is only dinner and
    then there** **is supper.

    11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking
    it** **when**  **you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar.

    12. Backwards and forwards means, 'I know everything about you.'

    13. The word 'jeet' is actually a phrase meaning, 'Did you
eat?'

    14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what
    time** **it** **is.  You work until you're done or it's too dark to
see.

    15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH EM.** (Mash of it, Doll!)**

    16. 'No. Jew?' is a common response to the question, 'Did you
bring
    any Coke?'

    17. You measure distance in minutes.

    18. You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.

    19. All the festivals across the state are named after a
    fruit,** **vegetable,** **grain, insect or animal.

    20. You know what a 'DAWG' is.

    21. You carry jumper cables in your car --- for your OWN car.

    22. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, Tabasco and Ketchup.

    23. The local papers cover national and international news on one
    page,**  **but**  **require 6 pages for local gossip and high school
    football.

    24. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

    25. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit warm.'

    26. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer,
    and**  **Christmas**.

    27. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past time known as 'goin'**
     **Wal-Martin' or 'off to Wally World.'

    28. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good stew
    weather.

    29. Fried catfish is the other white meat.

    30. We don't need no dang driver's ed. If our mama says we can
    drive,**  **we can**  **drive, dag-nabbit.

    31. If you understand these jokes,  forward them to your
    Texas ** **friends and those who //just wish they were from Texas .//

    32. **Yankees probably wont understand *

[larissacst]

Aug. 26, 2008 at 10:07 AM

i've seen it before but love it. nodding my head in agreement to all of them!!!