Continuation

[Valerie4882]

So last night I confronted him on the bar tab from my DS's first birthday.  He tried to say that everyone was drinking shots.  I know my friends had 10 of the 38 shots.  So that leaves 4 people.  28 divided by 4 is 7 shots a person.  That is a lot of drinking for a first birthday right?  Well I told him that he never said thank you to my parents.  He is claiming he did but why would my parents lie and say he didn't?  Then he turns it around on me and says I never say thank you for anyting he does and I am accusing him of the same things that I do.  I have an old email telling him I appreciate all he does.  Which is financially providing.  Yes that is a big thing but that is about all he does.  It's like he's holding it over me that he pays for everything.  Like I sit around all day buying stuff off of QVC which is not true at all.  I buy the things that we need.  He yells at me that he pays for everything and that our son is never hungry.  YOU ARE HIS PARENT that is WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO...right?  I try to get him to see that he was outta control with the alcohol at my son's b-day and he turns it into me not being grateful and throwing the money in my face.  Oh and he also blamed the bartender for the shots being so much.  He said the bartender didn't know how to make anything else and she told them to take shots.  SO DONT TAKE IT IF YOU DIDNT ORDER IT right?  He has an excuse for everything....but I ask him Yes you pay for everything and I appreciate it but does that make it OK for you to treat me like s*it every other day?  He had no response.  He says I never tell him when my dr. appts are for the unborn baby and I tell him that he never asks.  For the past 7 months he never asked once about the new baby.   He also had no response to that.  That was it.  He asked me what I want to do since I am obviously unhappy....I had a chance to say I want to leave....but how am I going to make it on my own.  I have a new baby in two months and a one year old.  I'm not even done studying for the phgarmacy tech exam....*sigh*  I am at my mother's house right now just to get away from the tension so I can feel happpy.  I didnt eat dinner last night because he made me feel so guilty for using his money for anything.  I cant eat when he is home.  Doesn't that fall into emotional abuse?

[laezpnai]

Sep. 2, 2008 at 1:34 AM

good for you for speaking up, im proud of you. its such a hard thing to do since things always tend to get worse before they get better no matter what you do. my bf likes to do the same thing and turn things around on me. i havent really figured out how to fix that but to throw it in his face when he does it.

i dont remember if you said before, but would he consider marriage counselling? or, is there someone from his family that you can trust to confide in that might be able to talk to him or help you talk to him?