more preschool stress

[beccapalm]

I just don't know what to do about Ansley going to preschool. 

I put her in for several reasons:

1. she needs some socialization/ friends her age
2. she needs to learn to play without me/ independence
3. she needs to be challenged intellectually

It has now been six weeks and the teacher had a little conference with me this morning about Ansley's behavior.  She still cries when I drop her off and doesn't really interact with the other children.  She sucks her thumb and has a lovey that she carries around incessantly (we're working on both things at home, too....) The teacher addressed the thumb-sucking/ bunny thing first by saying that they're going to start weaning her off of one at a time.  Like, the bunny stays in her cubby during the day and then eventually she'll stay at home.  And as for the thumb-sucking... i don't know... GOOD LUCK!! hahaha, I can use all the help with that I can get!

But, what I'm worried about is whether or not I should keep her in.  I've thought about my objectives/goals for what I was hoping to achieve from preschool, and I don't think Ansley going to preschool is meeting any of those!  She's actually clingier NOW than she was 6 weeks ago and she cries a LOT more now, too. The other little girls in the class, I guess go 5 days a week because Ansley comes home saying that the other little girls all play together and not with her.  Poor baby... she's so social everywhere we go, I can't imagine her being the wallflower at school!   I'm afraid that I've actually increased her anxiety and codependence by pushing her into preschool. 

The teacher says that her going only 2 days a week isn't good.  that a lot of children have a hard time adjusting to preschool when they only go 2 days a week, but it's all they've got available, so I can't change that.  Should I just pull her out?  I'm going back to work next year, so she'll definitely be going 5 days a week then.... I was just trying to work her in gently! 

lots to think about...

[mom2adamtyler]

Sep. 19, 2008 at 1:26 PM

Adam is now 5, but when he was 3 I had the same concerns about socialization.  He went to a preschool that was 2 days a week.  It was only a 2 day a week program so all the kids in the class had the same schedule.  He also has (an I mean still has) a lovey. The minute he walks through the door from kindergarten he wants it.  I never let him take it to preschool.  His lovey stayed in the car and waited for him.  Adam probably would have been more miserable knowing that his lovey was there in some cubby where he couldn't get to it.  Have you tried to keep the lovey home?  If they are trying to take her lovey that may make it worse.  Adam would have flipped out! 

[keeley73]

Sep. 19, 2008 at 8:07 PM

yikes - is there any chance you can stay in the classroom with her for a few times to watch and help her adjust. Emily's preschool teacher said that some kids just need mom there until they feel comfortable.  I would still keep trying to have her attend though.  When she is home and you talk to her about school how does she react?

[beccapalm]

Sep. 20, 2008 at 2:14 PM

after talking with my husband and, together, deciding to pull her out until next year (when I go back to work full-time) I sat down with Ansley to talk with her about it.  I asked her if she liked school... she said yes... arrggghhh!! so i guess we'll keep her in! after all that stress!!! I have sat in there for a few minutes, but she still breaks down when i leave.  but thanks for the advice about the lovey... we'll try keeping it at home next week!

(Original Poster)

[travnsue]

Sep. 25, 2008 at 10:22 PM

Maybe volunteering in the class? Maybe they will let you do that for a day or 2 so you can be able to see what is going on? They offered me a 5 day program last week but it is in the afternoons, I can't swing the money as she would love to go everyday- mine cries to go to the sitters everyday for a year now, so I feel you, good luck