Type 2 Diabetes and my new determination...

[Mom_2_Boyz]

So, with my last pregnancy, I was borderline gestational diabetes.  After the baby was born, he had trouble regulating his blood sugar for about 24 hours.  This tells me that I really did have at least borderline gestational diabetes.  There is no other reason for him to struggle with that.  So, this now is one more risk factor for me (I am already over weight) to have Type 2 Diabetes "when I grow up".  The sad thing, is that this will be a self-inflicted disease!  So, I have decided that I am going to do something about it!

I have been over-weight since I was 9 yo.  It all happened very suddenly and within a year of me starting my period, growing under-arm hair and sprouting breasts.  So, I am very suspicious that I have some kind of a hormonally related sugar/ insulin issue.  I have NEVER been thin or even "normal" weight since then.  By the time I was 14 or 15, I weighed 160-170 lbs.  I am 5' 3".  My senior year in high school, I weighed 188 lbs.  It was my all time high!  I took aerobics because I needed another half credit in "PE" to  graduate.  We only had about 20 minutes of exercise after changing, doing a small writing assignment and having time left to shower and change back into street clothes.  And, I obviously only did it 5 days a week.  However, I lost almost 35 lbs in one semester ( about 4 1/2 months).  At 155 lbs, that was the thinnest I had been (proportionate to my height) since I was NINE YEARS OLD!  I have to say, I dated a lot more that year... LOL!  But, I was more surprised at the physical difference.  That was a GREAT year.  I had a much easier time doing everything.  I kept it up, for the most part, in college and was 162 lbs when I met my husband. 

Marriage was the start to a downhill cycle!  I started birth control and gained almost 15 lbs in 2 weeks... I am NOT exaggerating!  My wedding dress barely fit.  None of my clothes fit.  I threw the BC away.  What a joke!  Why take something that made me fat and psychotic!  Of course, I decided to just have a baby instead of choosing new BC methods... (In reality, they were two separate decisions... unless you ask my husband.)  I got VERY sick and lost those 15 lbs before I was even 12 weeks pregnant.  But, I finally started and continued to gain and was 202 lbs when I delivered my first child!  He was born with multiple birth defects and I was under insane stress caring for him and putting my husband through school.  Even though I lost weight initially after he was born, by the time he was 3  months old, I weighed 198 lbs- NOT PREGNANT- a new all time high.  It was then I realized I had trouble bending, walking up stairs, etc.  How SAD!  So, with thoughts of my senior year, I started doing 30 minutes of aerobics 3 times a week.  It wasn't a lot, but it was something.  And it was hard to do more with a new baby, work and everything else.  Within 9 months of starting the aerobics, I was down to 185 lbs.  Still fat, but I was already feeling better!

Of course, as we women of child-bearing years like to do to ourselves, I got pregnant again.  This was an interesting pregnancy.  I had what I later found out was not just gall stones, but an infected gall bladder for the last half of the pregnancy.  I gained 10 lbs total that pregnancy and had an almost 8 lbs baby.  One week after I delivered, I was 25 lbs LIGHTER then before I got pregnant.  At 160 lbs, I decided to count my blessings and just do what I could to stay there!  Breastfeeding was heaven and I stayed around 165 lbs with little to no effort.  And then I stopped breastfeeding!  LOL!  I was "suddenly" 175 lbs!  I was determined to stop this before it started again.  I realized I had been able to eat about 3500 calories A DAY without gaining weight while I was breastfeeding!  I started counting Weight Watchers points (without going to meetings or joining, etc) and was down to 155 lbs in about 5 weeks.  I was ecstatic!  And then I got pregnant!   LOL!

This pregnancy was not as kind to me as the one before.  I gained 35 lbs and it was NOT water weight!  LOL!  Shortly after I delivered, I was 180 lbs.  I kind of hung out there for about a year.  Breastfeeding kept me there, but I was not loosing.  This was a difficult time for me.  I had serious issues with anxiety and I also had depression.  My chronic migraines were TERRIBLE!  I was incapacitated many days.  BY the time I went to my doctor, I was about 185 lbs!  I started Zoloft and a drug to prevent migraines.  It had a LOVELY side effect- weight loss.  I had a friend who had lost 70 lbs while on this drug.  I, however, lost 7 lbs.  But, I was happy for whatever!  At 178 lbs, I started exercising 2 or 3 days a week.  I got down to about 170 lbs and then I went off all the meds... so I could get pregnant!  LOL!  Although I hadn't lost a ton of weight on the meds, as soon as I went off, I gained about 15 lbs.  I was back to 187 lbs when I got pregnant with my 4th child.

So, my baby is 2 weeks old.  When I delivered him, I was 216 lbs.  Yeah.... talk about feeling good about yourself!  LOL!  I had gained almost 30 lbs.  I was sure, judging from my last pregnancy, that 15 of that was my fat!  Low and behold, the baby was 8 lbs 10 oz and I had tons and TONS of amniotic fluid.  I had a lot of swelling in my hands and feet.  So, here we are at 2 weeks and I have lost 25 lbs.  I guess this time it really was all water!  LOL!  With all the diabetes stuff, my doctor felt it necessary to remind me that I was now at a higher risk of getting diabetes later.  At the time, I was 215 lbs.... sure, I was 35 weeks pregnant, but it still hit me.  And I think that was his point.  It was not as though I walked into the first appointment at 135 lbs, either.... So, I decided to do something... after I delivered. 

My mom is very over-weight.  She is a couple inches taller than me, but currently weighs over 200 lbs (I think about 220, but I am not sure).  She has back problems and had to have back surgery about 15 years ago.  That puts a SERIOUS cramp in her exercising.  That combined with the natural effects of aging have made it really hard for her to loose weight.  She and I are really good friends and have struggled with weight together for the last 15-20 years.  When she was here after I had my baby, she was really worried.  I think the baby having sugar issues made us both face the facts about where we both were heading.  We both realized we were putting ourselves at risk.

I love, love, love food.  And I have been fat my whole life.  So, it is hard to change.  It is hard to not just keep doing what I have been doing.  But, I don't want to be my MIL who is morbidly obese and very sedentary.  She moves so slow.  And she seems lazy!  I can't imagine the effort it takes her to even walk and I am sure that is it more than true laziness.  I want to take my kids and, eventually, grandkids swimming and to the park and be able to interact with them- heck, I want to be able to sit on the floor with them without it being a huge production to get back up!  I know if I don't adapt that lifestyle now and loose the weight now, it will just get harder as I get older.   And I want to be healthy.  I don't want to have diabetes.  I don't want to stress my body because I am too selfish to give up food as an addiction.  UGH.... I just hope I can do this!  LOL!

I am starting at 192 lbs today.  I want to be 172 lbs by January 1st.  I have decided to weigh in weekly and update this post with my weekly numbers.  I need someone to be accountable to!  I know there will be weeks I just can't do it with a newborn and three other kid (two with special needs) and holiday treats.  But I just hesitate to put it off any longer.  It starts a bad cycle of waiting for "the right time".  Such a thing doesn't exist in this stage of life.  So, there will be weeks I won't loose or maybe gain a pound, but I am not looking for fast results.  I just want to change my thinking and my habits.

[Maisy19]

Sep. 29, 2008 at 12:51 PM

You could have written my life story here, except that I am a little taller and weigh a little more.  You rock!!!

[mama_pas]

Sep. 29, 2008 at 12:56 PM

Thank you for sharing this!  I know I too struggle with my weight and how it ties into self-image and self-esteem.  Remember that you can do all things through Christ who gives you strength!!!

[Mommy2Lilypad]

Sep. 29, 2008 at 2:00 PM

I am glad you feel confident in yourself and you know that you can do this! You are right.. this is the hardest time of year to loose weight but if you splurge a couple of days it isn't going to ruin months of your hard work. You can do it.. it will just take time. I want to wish you good luck! When its hard for you to stay on track try to think that you are adding happy and adventurous years to your life to spend with your kids and grandkids one day.

[whoiam]

Sep. 29, 2008 at 2:49 PM

You rock!  I am so encouraged by this post, you have no idea.  I am really feeling the motivation to get moving myself.  It will be really encouraging to keep up with you on your progress as I start my own attempts at losing this weight.

[Julie1313]

Sep. 30, 2008 at 9:33 AM

Good for you! It sounds like you have the willpower and motivation to push yourself and make healthy lifestyle changes! I wish you luck! I can't imagine trying to get back to being active and I only have TWO kids!!!