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I just want to cry............
- Oct 8, 2008 at 9:52 AM
- By
- Comments (4) Total Views (132) Everyone can see this journal post.
About 14 months ago I had to send my oldest son to live with his dad in Tennessee because he was just out of control and we had run out of options for help for him here. Well, his dad only had him for about 3 months before he gave up and turned him over to the state. Personally I am majorly pissed off at him for this because he was never around for my son when he was younger and, when given the chance to try and make it up to him by actually being a dad, he couldn't do it. It just isn't in him to make sacrifices for the good of his only son. So my son has been living in state facilities since November of last year. I haven't been able to see him at all since August 2007 and it is killing me inside.
Well, yesterday was his 16th birthday. He was recently moved to a new facility and I have been unable to get anyone on the phone to tell me how he is doing. I SO wanted to speak to him yesterday (I haven't heard from him at all for over three weeks), to tell him Happy Birthday, to tell him that I love him, and to let him know that he is in the hearts and minds and prayers of the whole family. Since I have been unable to get anyone on the phone (after numerous calls and messages), I was unable to talk to him. I just want to crawl in my bed, cover my head, and cry my eyes out. I miss him so much it feels like part of my heart has been ripped out, and I know his brothers are hurting too, not to mention my mom, my sister, and my niece and nephews.
I know that I did the best thing I could do for him when I sent him to Tennessee. We had no one here who could help him or me and he would have wound up in jail (or worse) if I had not done what I did. It just hurts so bad that I cannot see him or hug him and I hate that I had to miss another birthday. I just don't know what to do.
Comments:
praying over this for you also.
I just read your post...Don't you have any rights as his parent anymore? After living in state facilities he may be ready to do what it takes to come back and live with you. He needs to know how much you love him. Can you write to him there? I would call every minute until they let you talk to him. They will get so irritated they'll have no choice but to get him on the phone. Best of luck to you. I pray for you that he can come home and stay on the right path. He obviously needs guidance and there is a small window of opportunity right now for him to get it. Best wishes.
my name is pam i live in brunswick and with two boys of my own in can simpathize with you keep calling his case worker over and over and over mamas dont give up
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I am so sorry I didn't visit your page earlier. I feel so bad for you. You must think that no one cares. I'm also very ashamed of myself for not being a very good friend.
Have you talked to him since you wrote this? How can they just take him w/o notifying you of his wherabouts?
Certainly, there has to be someone that can help you! I'd be out of my mind! Your son must feel so alone!
My heart and prayers are with you all. Please let me know how things are.
- Plethorarosie
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