It is just shy of 3 months since we moved to Kansas from Florida, and I am really missing home. It just seems like there is so much going on back home since I left and I am missing out on all of it. The company that I work for has started a Running Club and all my running buddies have joined and are now doing group runs 6 days of the week. I am so jealous that this is happening and I am not there to be a part of it. I miss running with a group it is so much harder to push your self when you run alone. I have tried to join some groups out here, but it did not work out. The trail group does most of there runs at night and I am not too comfortable running on a rocky trail in the woods at night so I stopped going to there runs. The women's running group I tried was to fast. I run at about 11min pace and they all were faster and left me in the dust so I ended up running alone anyway.
Back home I had a big group of friends to do things with all the time and here I have just me. It is very hard getting use to doing everything alone. I am working from home so no chance of meeting anyone at work. I guess I am just really feeling lonely and am missing my family and friends. This winter is going to be long and lonely, I guess I better get use to it and stop feeling so sad.
DH has friends out here so he does not understand just how lonely it is when you have no friends. And how sick of being at home you get when you live and work at home. I just can't believe how hard this is and it has only been 3 months I hope it gets easier because this is just too hard already. I am so sick of being sad all the time and trying to put on a happy face so my DD and DH don't know just how sad I truly am. At this point I hate talking to my friends back home because they tell me of all the things they are doing and it makes me so sad because I cant' do them too. Yesterday a group of friends did the Herald Hunt (a big scavenger hunt) we have done this together for years, they called me in the middle of it so that I could look something up for them, I started to cry as soon as I got off the phone because I really would have loved to be there. Then I sucked it up and took the baby and dog for a run so I would not cry all day. Does this get any easier? Will I ever be able to talk to my friends back home with out feeling so sad?
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