Depression: You Can't Just Get Over It

[GrannyLynn]

I have bipolar disorder; I'm manic depressive and have been on medication for it since 1994.  I sought professional help when I realized I wanted to die in spite of the fact I had a family who loved & needed me. The agony of feeling so heavy and helpless inside was becoming more than I could handle. I loved my husband and my kids but felt I just couldn't deal with the pain any longer. The depression actually made me hurt physically!
If I've learned anything at all about depression, it is that you cannot just 'get over it' whenever you decide. It is a physical illness as well as a mental condition and your body takes time to find its balance again. There are things going on in your system that will improve over time and you can help that along if you choose to eat healthy foods, exercise a little bit every day, and stay as busy as possible with routine activities. When it comes to exercise, even just going up and down a flight of stairs can be helpful. Walking is definitely one of the best things you can do.
And you know what? It is perfectly okay to cry while holding and rocking your baby. You've no reason to feel guilty if dark clouds of depression are hovering over you.  If you have the freedom to stay home with your children and don't want to get dressed all day, that is okay but at least comb your hair and brush your teeth. When you're feeling really lethargic, choose an activity that takes no thinking such as washing the floor. Something about being on your hands and knees on the floor soothes the spirit. Perhaps it is the warm water, or the motion of scrubbing, or the scent of the cleaning solution in the water, or maybe a combination of things; I don't know. It has, however, helped me many times over the years. Sometimes I get just a small space washed and other times the whole kitchen, hall and utility room get washed. Whatever it is, I find I sleep better from physical rather than mental tiredness.
   One trick I found helped me get through the days was to use my kitchen timer. I could set it for five, ten or fifteen minutes and work on something like cleaning the kitchen only until it chimed. If I did that four or five times throughout the day, I felt better like I'd accomplished something and yet wasn't overwhelmed.

If the pain of depression gets so bad that you are thinking of suicide, please know that there are professional people whose lives are dedicated to helping you find ways to stop the pain. You might think you're just one insignificant person is the world but to your children and family, you are the world.

[dodie_s]

Nov. 19, 2008 at 7:20 PM

you are such a Brave Woman! my mother was Bi and she had a hard time spent most of it alone. just the fact that your raising your childern is wonderful. my youngest is Bi plus depression, anixiety , PTSD, and hormone issues. so I know how diffucelt it can be. I read your post and said thats Liz.. I will pray for you that God contuine to bless you and protect and provide what you need. blessing's on you. Dodie

[presley2004]

Nov. 25, 2008 at 1:12 PM

you sound just like me...sometimes, like yesterday..i cleaned the whole living room, moved stuff, and went from 9am till 10pm....and then some days the past few weeks, i have only gotten up to feed my babies, and to go pee...people dont understand and stereotype us as "cybil" but, i always tell people who give me crap, like my family, they dont understand.....i tell them if they had one day in my head....just one day and they would see.... we are very much alike and i would love to continue to talk to you...please pm me anytime... amber