Croup

[Jennifer761]

   I don't actually expect anyone to read this -though one can if they want; because I just wanted to vent & feel much better after having written it down; about my son's experience with croup. 

   This is the fourth time my youngest (J) has had croup. This is the second out of three times he has been sent away from the E.R. untreated.

    I was & am soo pissed off about it.

    I usually go pretty early on in the virus because J will lay down at night then stop breathing. Thats what scares me. It comes on suddenly. He usually has a cold or something, often very minute, with it. But once J is awake he acts like nothing is wrong. The croupy cough usually develops after a night or two of difficulty breathing. I never had a child with croup before so this is really scary to me. When J is awake he will not even cough if he doesn't have a terrible cold...just wakes up all night long gasping for breath but the worst is when he wakes up silent for a few seconds (20 to 30 maybe up to a minute -I guess @ it & don't really know because it scares me, its the middle of the night -the house is often dark & I am often dreary from sleep, scared & confused. Then I spend the rest of the time trying to help him get into a position inwhich he can breathe in. Sometimes its extremely difficult or impossible to find that position. Sometimes its not so bad.) Just as suddenly as it comes on it also seems to lye (LIE) dormant as though he does not have it, meaning...by the time we get to the ER he is wide awake & one would never know that for some reason only at night, naps when he is sleeping does he struggle to breathe ALL NIGHT LONG.

   So apparently 1/2 of the time we get to the ER -THEY THINK I AM A LIAR. Alright, lets get beyond how insulting that is....WHY? why would I lie? Do I enjoy running to the ER whenever scared to death adding to it the fact that its at least 40 minutes any direction from here, they salt the roads out here last & I have to tote along an elder child with autism or by SOME MIRACLE find someone to watch him. I HATE ER-s.

   It is actually hard for me to hate doctors because some of my family members are in the medical field as well. -Even after those years before we knew B had autism, when good doctors were telling me bad things like; "he just is not well disciplined, you should spank him next time"....."You're a new mom & you don't know how to discipline him"....."Why do you keep switching doctors? YOU CAN"T SWITCH DOCTORS!!"....."Maybe hes deaf, lets have the specialist test him AGAIN". YEARS OF THAT CRAP & NO HELP FOR MY SON. (until I finally found ONE who actually listened & of course BY THEN IT WAS OBVIOUS!) I still did not HATE doctors.I could understand WHY they were scared to diagnose it so early & why it presented as a little confusing. (I was a new mom & everyone makes mistakes).

One thing I don't mess with is breathing problems. Ok -I absolutely know that by the time we reach the ER J makes a total liar of me, unless he has a major cold with it & is doing the croupy cough over & over & over. (Its like the singing frog in that old cartoon...except my husband does see it too.) And, of course I don't hate doctors...but I have NEVER been so angry with one while in their office before in all my life. I had to just come out & say it because I was just giving off such attitude (usually I'm much more controlled), so I just told her I am so angry with you right now (one doctor at least). "Wait & see if it gets batter?" Really? So every night J gets dragged out of the house because he can not breathe & spend hours at the ER UNTIL you finally see it for yourself! Better?! It has never gotten better....but we'll see, maybe it will, maybe I'm wrong. I mean it is COLD here now & thats what made it disappear by the time we got to the ER -cold air helps J more than anything. This morning i was really scared because his difficulty in catching his breath continued for an hour after waking (waking for the third time), it has never continued after waking up for an entire hour before. No it wasn't continual, yes he was crying in between. But usually with in 15 minutes of waking he can be calmed by me holding him (stops crying) & with in 5 minutes of waking, sitting up -he can breathe normally again. He had the croupy cough this morning (which is oddly fast, that usually shows the next day) but the cold air really healed it by the time we got to the ER.

   The first time we went to the ER with croup J had the croupy cough continually although the obvious symptoms of breathing difficulties was either not there or was minimal at that point (he saved that for night time), they read the one sign that even a but blind baboon could read & treated him. The doctor even educated me, drawing a picture for me of the trachia -on what was happening...very smart doctor.

The second time at the same ER -different doctor (middle of the night)...J appeared totally fine by the time we got there. He had not yet developed the croupy cough. So they though I might be seeing things (is that a nice way of saying dillusional?)....thankfully one attending nurse with a lick of sense called our regular pediatrician & they wanted us to go to another hospital by ambulance. (Thay are probably great doctors actually just -I am really angry right now that this is happening, I don't know a lot about croup -only that breathing problems are not something I ever intend to goof around with or misread. What I told the doctors happened -happened.) Well I opted out of the ambulance because I was afraid J would never sleep at the hospital & it would happen again. But later on it got worse, by the time I got back to the second hospital he had been drooling -but only a little bit, I don't think the doctors SAW it. Indicating that by then he was struggling to get enough air even when he was breathing (so I think) to start drooling. But it was the same at the hospital...he woke up, acted fine ...thankfully they did treat him...I don't know why, maybe it was because I was shaking by the time I got there...the forty+ minute speed there was terrifying. Maybe they heard something in his lungs, probably because our on call ped originally transferred us there. Maybe they just decided to believe me (L.O.L.).

Today was a whole different animal; maybe they're right (even though if it is a virus like they said it should last a few days to a week)  -maybe it will get better & by the time we get to the doctors tommorrow he will be just fine -I'm sure he will appear fine either way, as he always does when he is awake. It never has gotten better before (not once it reached the point he was at this morning with the breathing problems....if it reaches that point it usually gets worse or stays the same. But apparently my word isn't crap and we'll just play around with a 2 year old's ability to breathe even when it comes on so suddenly -apparently thats what people do for croup. & -this time the co-mingling cold is really not bad at all.)....there was only one other time J had croup but I never took him in THAT time because it actually wasn't real bad & he didn't have a lot of trouble catching his breath at night (very minimal).

Maybe I AM too panicky because of the breathing issues. Who cares about the cough -thats nothing. Maybe I don't keep on & keep on & keep on changing his position, opening windows, giving baths until he is able to catch his breath well enough...maybe I don't wait it out enough. J never passes out, he never turns blue, he just all of a sudden wakes all night unable to catch his breath, scared, scared...& it goes on & on & its bad enough to be really scary but appears as though it will probably never be bad enough to need a breathing machine....but I have gotten steroids for him a couple of those times. I don't know -how MUCH do people play with breathing problems in 2 year olds? If he ever passes out while we're still 40 minutes away from the hospital -what then? I was told some kids need breathing treatments when having croup....though J only had a bad cold comingling with croup once & steroids were enough, and I think these problems are more of the "Will he keep breathing?" "How long can he go with out air before passing out?" kind....It makes me wonder; Do they take croup/breathing problems seriously these days? Besides all of this; hot steamy air makes croup worse for J (& it used to for me as a kid too...but back then thats all they told moms, they told moms to avoid cold air) -cold air seems to nearly change it entirely; so I learned today in the winter freeze ride there & back. Oh & they're looking at whether he is exhausted because maybe then he had been up late enough -L.O.L., he sleeps on the forty minute ride there & back -straight upright in his carseat (which i can not safely do at night)....of course he is ready to go once at the ER between his cat naps @ night, 40 minute upright ride, & being 2.....besides isn't THAT how croup works?

Knowing his history, how could they just send him away like "oh, c'mon back if it gets worse" Yeah! Been there before! Really trust YOUR judgement now! Its not a two way street though....a doctor not respecting what the mother is saying but a mother being forced to just accept what a doctor in the ER is saying. Now my son is tired again, so I will see if he is able to nap & maybe this time since the cold isn't so bad, the croup will just magically go away or get better....or maybe it will magically get worse & I will have no where to go for help for him...or maybe we'll just drive around all night in the cold since that helps the most...because apparently I  am a liar. Thats just it -no one says anything logical like; we find him being unable to catch his breath for up to one minute an acceptable consistant struggle for him for around 7 days, even if it happens several times a night -Only something worse than that like passing out, the but blind babboon sign of the croupy cough (which isn't actually worse at all, but merely there so that even nubs can diagnose it) will need a steroid....When they're dead we diagnose them with sids or some unexplainable thing. When they're nearly dead & brain damage from lack of oxygen has occurred, or they have passed out many, many times -we do breathing treatments. THAT KIND OF TALK I COULD UNDERSTAND.

Our only hope is seeing our regular pediatrician tommorrow. She is a good doctor & will probably use explainative logical statements like the ones I've listed above -IF I AM BEING TOO PANICKY, and if not I do trust that SHE actually has enough experience with croup or colleegs with enough experience with croup to get to the bottom of it. Though I'm scared....& will be praying for the right kind of help. I sure hope it has magically gotten better & tonight won't be terribly frightening -with no where to go.

 

[FXmomTo3]

Nov. 22, 2008 at 7:10 AM

Hugs!  Croup is so scary for us Moms!!!  Phillip gets croupy every year....the hospital here never takes it seriously enough either.....I'm getting used to dealing with it myself now because i figure there is not point going to the hospital anymore....grrrrr....so i just wrap the two of us up in blankets and coats and scarves and mitts etc and go sit outside in the midnight air....within a half hour or so he can usually go back to sleep for a couple hours, then out again at 2 or 3 am.....and then he's fine for the day......

[FoxyLady42]

Nov. 22, 2008 at 10:08 AM

My kids use to get the croup all the time too when they were young, and it is scary. I would always keep a humidifier going in there room, and I would also steam them with Vick's. It really would help loosen up there cough and ease there breathing. I know it is old school meds, but it still does work. Hang in there Mom, you will get through this okay.

[SusanReeves]

Nov. 24, 2008 at 7:57 AM

My son also has croup right now, and he had it 2 weeks ago(not sure if it went away or just went quiet for a week) He has had it like 20 times since he was born, he will be 3 in Jan.  I will treat it my self most of the time but when he seems to be coughing a little more than normal I will take him to the ped. in fact I will be calling her this morning since he has it agian after a round of steriods and cough suppresant.  Last year when it was recurring like this she put him on an inhaler and singular everyday for a few months. it seemed to help with him getting it on a regular basis.  I have done extensive research on croup and it appears that croup is actually acondition, some kids have, and the attack is brought on my a virus that can be contracted.  Including parainfluenza, RSV, common cold, pneumonia, just to name a few.  Some times it will include a fever, low grade and should not last more than 3 days. I give Motrin and that seems to help with the inflammation and the fever.  It is always worse at night, but I know that it is scary.  I to have taken a few trips to the er.  I would ask your ped for an inhaler with albuterol to keep at the house you can use it in the middle of the night to help with breathing.  I will most likely put my son back on the singular today.  Sometimes croup can be brought on my an allergic reaction, or something lodged in the throat. But I am sure you would notice that.  I do hope you son feels better and remember your mommy sense is smarter than the doctor if you feel something is wrong then get another opinion.

[Cherie71]

Nov. 26, 2008 at 2:42 AM

I cannot even tell you how many nights my mom laid on a lawn chair with me wrapped in blankets in the backyard so that I could breathe well enough to sleep.  Funny the things you forget when you become an adult and think your parents have lost their minds..... I was just reading your post and thinking of all the nights I could not sleep because of the coughing and just the inability to get air into my lungs.  The steroid pills they tried to stop or prevent my chronic bronchitis, the inhalers because they decided I had asthma... but the only thing that truly helped me was when my mom would wrap me in a cozy blanket and take me out to lay on her lap in a lawn chair to breathe in the cold air and soothe me to sleep.  What a great mom I had and what a great mom you are being to you baby!