HOW DARE THEY!!

[lnlsmama]

So today was my sons 2nd birthday and everything was going great till we got home to finish up his bday party and we noticed we missed a call on my cell from his aunt. At first we though ok shes calling to tell Landin Happy birthday, so we called her back that way she could tell him before he was too in to his new toys. My husband called her back and thes first thing out of her mouth is Walt im terribly sorry. My husband giggled and was like its ok you, heres Landin. Well before he could hand him the phone shes says "Walt Gramma has passed away." He sat for a min in silence and let her finish, she said that the she had passed on Wednesday and that the entire family was there for the memorial at the church tomarrow and was so sorry no one had told him. All he could do was cry really, i mean i didnt blame him, that was his only gramma left and the only gramma he was close to, like his second mother. She told him she thought for sure his mom would have called him to let him know since this is a family situation so he could call off work for a few days to come down, and if anything make sure we werent called w such bad news on my sons birthday since he is her grandson and most grammas dont want their babies to hear such news on such a good day, but she never did, she did nothing. I couldnt help but be very upset, i mean a mother is something who no matter how much she is hurting you have to make sure your children arent hurting ten times worse and has you to turn to in times like this, but no, nothing!!

         So here we are the only ones in the family unable to make the services because he cant call off work at the last min. and a ticket for last min is REALLY expensive that we just dont have money for, now if they would have let us know Wednesday when it happen, he could have gotten his time off work and we could have drove to washington from california in time and it would have been cheap enough and the entire family could be there since i cant fly due to Liam is only 3 weeks old and im not fully healed from my c section. UGH im soo pissed at my MIL, i mean its not his aunts fault, its not her job to call him and let him know, its his damn moms!! Of course shes there w his dad and 2 sisters, and have yet to call, but i guess i couldnt expect much from the woman who changes her number and never contacts us w the new one and has yet to call to hear about her new grandson, if it wasnt for his aunt, she wouldnt know about him cause we didnt know her number, we had to hunt everyone down in the family and beg from any who had the number just to let her know that liam was here and all the info about him. But when it comes to close family passing like this, you think shed put her selfishness aside and think about her child. The one who was closest to her, the one who continued on the family name on the railroad just to make his gramma happy. but no NOTHING!! I just hate her, i dont use the word too much cause its such a strong word, but i do, i honestly can say I HATE HER!!

      This woman has made my husband cry for the VERY last time. It was hard enough hearing him cry over trying to figure out what was wrong with him for his own mother to not love him and not want to be around his family, but when its messing w his heart in the way of others that he loves, im sorry but i just want to slap in her face SOO bad! I told my hubby if he wants to go, i would scrape money up for him to fly there and come back, but he says hes afraid he may hit his mom as well for being such a selfish woman and cause he knows his work will say no since its such short notice and hed have to leave EARLY in the morning. I just dont know what to do anymore though. I know the tears arent over for my husband, i know every man needs his momma and his will never give in and just let us be part of their lives, but being the man he is, he gives everyone chances, he finds the good in everyone and feels everyone can change over time, but how do you tell a man to give up on his momma?? I've tried and tried for these past 6 yrs we've been married and i just dont know what else to do, this has been my last straw. She has no more chances w me, and i know if she can emotionally hurt her own child like this, my children will be next and i will NOT let that happen.

      Ok well i think my venting is over, for now lol. Thanks for any ideas or replies anyone may have. I <3 my cafemommies lol!!!

[niccinoz]

Nov. 22, 2008 at 2:10 PM

honey, i am so terribly sorry for your loss!  his work has to let him off its called bereavement leave, he gets 3 days for his and your immediate family when they pass, tell him to call his boss, at home if he has to, but he needs to be there he will never forgive himself if he misses the funeral!

[KingB]

Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:06 PM

Erin, I am so sorry. Please give Walt my condolences. I lost my gramma 6 years ago this coming wed. Yep the day before Thanksgiving. My Aunt who was like a second mom to me (she was in the delivery room when Lenora was born) passed 2 years ago on the 13th of this month. If there is any way for Walt to get there, I hope it happens. I wasn't able to go to my gramma's and I regret it still to this day. I've been to her grave about 3 times now. I am so sorry for the way Walt's mom is behaving. I hope she comes around and figures out the hurt that she has caused him and your family.

[whoamelissa08]

Nov. 25, 2008 at 11:33 AM

Hi Erin, Man!  How totally frustrating.  I understand though.  My hubby hasn't ever had a father, he's alive, but has had zero involvement in his life.  If there's anyway you can get Walt where he needs to be, you should.  What a mess.  I'm praying for you....neighbor! 

Melissa