I haven't been her much lately.  I can't seem to get excited enough to do much of anything lately.  Hubby and I have been so many issues lately.  It started with one little fight and in the middle of it all the issues we haven't been dealing with came pouring out.  I guess it's good but I am tired of working so hard to make it all work.  I want it to work, I just don't know if I have the patience to let time heal wounds, and for us to move to the next stage.  A part of me wants to give up so bad.  Just tell him to get out leave me alone and not bother me again.  But at the same time we have been married for 20 (21 in January) and so many things have gotten better.  I just need the last few things to work out.  Just they are the hard ones like communicating better.  He seems to thinks it's getting better, I guess cause I keep having screaming fits and he eventually understands a little more each time.  I can see it in his eyes, he will have an Ah Ha moment and be like really have I really done that.  I H A T E to yell and I hate to fight.  I need him to get it before I go nuts-o.  Does that seem wrong?  I hope I that today is the last one, but I know it wont be.  And I don't expect perfection, I am not so how can I think he will be.  I just need say something in a rational tone and he think, wow she really means it.  Am I asking to much?

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Feb. 16, 2009 at 8:26 PM Well needless to say that wasn't the last fight. I guess they at least are more productive. We are able to undersnd each other better, which is probably because we r better at talking. While I don't think things are as good as my husband thinks they are. I will have to admit it is way better and I don't want to keep working. So that is good,

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