Dear Santa.... From: Mom

[neonds13]

Dear Santa, 

I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned, and cuddled my children on demand,visited the doctor's more than the my doctor. Sold sixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree on the school playground. I figured out how to attach nine patches onto my daughter's girl scout sash with staples and glue gun.     I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my child's red crayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years     Here are my Christmas wishes:     I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache after a day of chasing kids ( any color except purple which I already have) and arms that don't flap in the breeze, but are strong enough to carry a screaming toddler out of the candy aisle in the grocery store, I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine somewhere in the seventh month of my last pregnancy,     If your hauling big ticket items this year, I like a car with fingerprint resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music; a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals, and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone.     On the practical side, I could use a talking daughter doll that says "Yes Mommy"to boost my parental confidence,along with one potty trained toddler, two kids that don't fight, and three pair of jeans that will zip all the way up without the use of power tools. I could also use a recording Tibetan monks chantin "don't eat in the living room" and "take your hands off your brother", because my voice seems to be just out of my children's hearing range and can be heard only by the dog.     And please don't forget the Playdoh Travel Pak, the hottest stocking stuffer this year for mothers of preschoolers. It comes in fluorescent colors and is guaranteed to crumble on any carpet making the In-laws house seem just like mine.     If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enough time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury of eating food warmer than the room temperature without it coming in a Styrofoam container. If you don't mind I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season it be to much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely.     It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family; or if my toddler didn't look so cute sneaking downstairs to eat contraband ice cream in his pajamas at midnight.     Well Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is ringing and my son saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think he wants his red crayon back. Have a
safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the chimney and come dry off by the fire so you don't catch a cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table, but don't eat to many or leave crumbs on the carpet.    

Yours always.............    
Mom    

P.S: one more thing...you can cancel all my requests if you can keep my children young enough to believe in Santa.

[neonds13]

Dec. 24, 2008 at 11:22 AM

PLEASE VOTE POPULAR & BUMP!!!!

(Original Poster)

[Galdarisimom]

Dec. 25, 2008 at 6:44 PM too cute heres a bump for you