My Mother's christmas present.

[MythicMMM]

we talked on the phone earlier today. but as I sat here thinking about our relationship I decided I should atleast send I her a E-mail explaining why I didn't want to contact her as much. I owe her that much.

It has taken me a while to sort out what I want to say. but I will start with the fact that I don't hate you and yes I do love you. but the well being of Quintin and Kris (my "new" family) trump that. when ever we talked on the phone in the past for days afterwards I would become angry and depressed. the anger would turn towards Kris, which was starting to deteriorate our relationship, and I would start to neglect my duties in caring for Quintin as well as the cleanliness of the house which also has a direct impact on lil Q's safety.

I'd like to open up our communication better in the future, but right now I have to focus on building the strength of my family. unfortunately the selling of the cougar, your lower expectations for Matt, and over all passive aggressiveness about my moving away was hindering that.

I just wanted to address briefly about how you are worried I am making the same mistakes you did. but in sitting and pondering I realized that we are different people with different wants, needs, and goals in life, and what may have been a mistake for you might actually be the right path for me. I've found more meaning, genuine happiness and joy in my life that I had always seem to have been missing. I've also had the chance to learn more about my actual self, like that I like collecting snow globes.

[coffeechick2]

Dec. 25, 2008 at 7:03 PM

I know it was hard for you to write that email.I know because l do not have any contact with my mother at all a lot different than you your willing to try at some point.Hardest thing l ever did was letting my mom go but for me it was the right choice.And your right you have to do what is right for you and your family....Don't forget that.