New Year's Past, Present, and Future

[4boysmom32]

It's that time again.  A new year.  A new start.  Time to make those resolutions that this year, we're going to keep! 

Like millions of others, every year on January 1st, I make my resolutions.  2008 was the first year that I can honestly say that I kept my new year's resolution, and the reason I am able to say that is because my only resolution for 2008 was to not make any resolutions.  I finally became tired of making resolutions that I know I am not going to keep. 

This year, I have decided to jump back into the new year's waters and make some resolutions.  I am hoping that by reflecting on my past mistakes,  I will learn how to finally make resolutions that I am able to keep. 

When I think back to some of my previous broken resolutions, I realize that one of the mistakes I make is that I am too general and not specific enough in setting my goals.  For example, I have often made the resolution to get into shape.  I always start with the best intentions: For example, in 2001, I joined a gym.  I attended the gym pretty regularly for about 5 months, but pretty soon I started finding excuses for not going.  After school got out, it was even harder to drag myself out of bed early in the morning to go workout, and when I got pregnant, I found the perfect excuse to avoid the gym altogether.  Thus, when December 31st rolled around, I was unable to say that I had achieved my goal.  In 2006, I decided that perhaps the reason I wasn't keeping my resolution to stay in shape was because I didn't like going to the gym, so I decided that I would workout at home.  I bought an inexpensive elliptical machine, and worked out pretty regularly for about 6 months -- just enough time for the warranty to run out and the machine to break.  In March of 2008, I joined another gym, not as part of a new year's resolution, but just as part of my own personal goal.  So far, I have been attending the gym on a regular basis, and I am proud to say that I can now run 3 miles without taking a break, followed by a half-hour of weight training and 50 stomach crunches.

So, when it comes to physical fitness, 2009 is already starting off on the right track.  This year, instead of vowing to get in shape, I am vowing to stay in shape.  In order to do that, I have set very specific goals for myself.  I will continue to go to the gym at least twice a week for at least an hour at a time.  By the end of March, I am hoping to be able to run for 5 miles, and by the end of year, I am hoping to be able to run 8 miles.  Twice a week at the gym is something that is very do-able for me.  If I commit to more than that, then I will most likely break my resolution.  Hopefully I can make it more than twice a week, but I am more likely to keep my resolution if I take baby steps and set achievable goals.

The other thing that I have learned from my past mistakes is that I need to make sure that my resolutions involve something that I am willing and ready to do.  In 2004, I decided that I should learn a new skill.  I was embarassed by the fact that I don't know how to sew.  Most of my friends had sewing machines, and I felt like I was the only mom in the world who couldn't sew.  That year, I bought a sewing machine, determined to learn how to use it.  After one lesson, I gave up and never touched it again.  I finally wound up giving the sewing machine away, losing the money I spent on it along with my ambition to learn something new. 

This year, I have once again decided to learn a new skill.  I feel that I need to increase my talents and capabilities.  Learning a new skill would not only allow me to build up my own feelings of self-worth, but I also feel that it is important to have a skill of some kind in case of an emergency.  I hate the idea of being completely reliant on my husband's income.  If anything were ever to happen to him, and I had to return to work, I don't know what I would do.  I never finished college, and I have very few skills that would be of use in the job field.  With that in mind, and with a remembrance of the sewing fiasco, I have determined that in order for me to learn a new skill, I need to focus on something that is of interest to me. 

In April of last year, I decided to learn a new skill.  I thought about my interests and talents and realized that I enjoyed helping people and that I was good at providing comfort to others.  I took a 6 week course through the prosecuting attorney's office in which I trained and became certified to be a crisis interventionist for sexual assault victims.  Since then, I have found fulfillment in my volunteer work as a hospital advocate for women who have been victims of sexual assault.  While this skill has been very fulfilling to me, I still feel the need to continue to improve myself by learning something new.  There are many things that I am somewhat interested in, but in order to truly stick to my resolution of learning a new skill, I had to take a personal inventory and think of something that I knew I would stick to.  One thing I have always loved and had an interest in is animals.  I love working with all animals, but I am particularly fond of dogs.  Therefore, I decided that this year, I would like to study to be a certified dog trainer.  The only obstacle I am facing with achieving this goal is coming up with the money for the training school, but once I am able to overcome that barrier, I feel that this is something that I am willing to stick to.  Once I am able to get my certification, I will be able to work part time as a dog trainer.  I will have a flexible job where I can set my own hours and make some income on the side.  This will allow me to achieve my next goal, to finish my education. I am not resolving to complete this goal in 2009, since there are so many other things that need to happen first, but my plan is to become a dog trainer and use the money I make from that job to pay for my college education.  My long-term career goal is to become a marriage counselor, but I still need to complete a few more years of college before I am able to achieve that goal.  If I get a student loan, I will not be able to achieve my other resolution, which is to get out of debt.

So, in 2009, I vow to stay in shape, and to learn a new skill.  I will report back exactly one year from now on whether or not I was able to achieve those resolutions.