Holidays from hell with autism... but we survived

[NYSusan]

I am sure many families with autism must dread the holidays. We sure did but we made it through. over all my daughter gina was great. besides the usual holiday things. The christmas tree with lights did not go over well. there was no ornaments because it scared her. so, we took them off and left the lights. which had to be steady. when they would blink, that was it. meltdown and screaming. so, when we did visit my inlaws, as soon as she saw the tree, that was it. Hello autism.  The best was hearing realatives say that there is nothing wrong with her. why are you making a big deal out of it. I just love that one. My all time favorite.  new years was a bomb. We normally stay home, but we decided to go to a family members house. she was fine until it got a little crazy and noisy. OMG. i thought i needed some therapy by the time the night was over. i am so happy that the holidays are over. I love my little girl no matter how many meltdowns she has or screaming fits. The one thing that i hate is when family just keeps on you about how crazy we must be. give me a break. they basicly push us to the side because of her autism. there are many times that my inlaws have everyone together on the weekends and we are told to come another time. because it is too much. can you imagine. my husband is the youngest of 7, so just imagine how he felt when my mother in law made that comment.  he is the only one who is not there with his family. they dont know how it is to have this for 24 hours a day seven days a week. They cant comprehend why we cant travel 3 hours to visit, because gina can not sit that long and the change of routine just kills her. Why we cant have ornaments on the tree? and why doesnt she like my gift? and why is she crying because of the noise? why wont she eat what i made?  I have explained it over and over and they just keep putting up a fight. and the worst part is that this is my husbands family. who he cant deal with it, when it comes to explaining my daughters autism. so, it is all up to me. My family is pretty good with understanding and they do include us all the time. At least one family is pretty good. I don't mean to go on and on. but is just gets to me. I have decided that i am no longer accepting how they treat us and for now on . my little angel will come first. I love my daughter leanne, my son vinny, my husband  peter and of course my autistic angel gina.

Autism may suck at times, but when your child gives you a beautiful smile and a hug,  Autism lost at that moment and your child won.

[Jennifer761]

Jan. 3, 2009 at 1:00 AM

holidays can be pretty tough, so can folks (family)..... but I love your persevering spirit (I love the way your post ended).....really just wanted to say thanks for sharing (your whole post; great post!) (I've a son with autism & can relate to what you've said.)

[BooBear666]

Jan. 6, 2009 at 8:49 PM

I admire you, I can't even comprehend the amount of hassle you go through with your in laws. I am sorry that they can't realize how special Gina is. They seem unable or unwilling to understand that autism is  disorder that can happen to anyone regardless if no one else in either side of the family has it. I pray that enlightenment comes to them before it is too late. I hope that they don't push you and your family so far away hat it will be impossible to find their way back .

[passionate1]

Jan. 28, 2009 at 2:43 PM

I understand so well. Then you have the family members who let the child do whatever because they think they don't know any better in a nice way calling them dumb. I hate it . Just because a child is autistic doesn't mean they don't have a clue . They are very bright people. Birthdays are hard also in my household. But you keep doing whats best for your angel. Keep a smile on your face no matter what and remember to laugh cause if you don't this society will tear you apart!