Being a parent

[dianah1]

Sometimes it can be so hard not to withdraw from everything and everyone.  I have battled depression since I was about 13 years old.  That was when I came to understand my being adopted, and being molested when I was in a foster home.  Then at the age of 15, I was raped.  I always had very low sel-esteem and thought I could not do anything right.  

My home life was very full of turmoil.  Dad was abusive, mentally, verbally and physically.  Mom did the best she could and prayed constantly.  Dad finally stopped being abusive, thank God!  Don't get me wrong, mom and dad loved me and I love them very much!  Mom raised me in church and taught me to have a strong faith in God.

All of this has carried over into my married life and how I mother my children.  I always told myself that my children would not grow up in a home where there was a great deal of yelling and argueing.  Yet, I find myself making some of the same mistakes that my parents made.

Are we "doomed" to make the same mistakes that our parents made?  Is it possible to be different that what we were raised to be like if we so choose?  I want to be the best mom and wife I can be.  I just want to reverse the mistakes I have already made and stop withdrawing when I don't do everything "just right".

[Katie911]

Jan. 11, 2009 at 1:33 AM

I have asked myself those very same questions.  I was sexually abused by my almost stepdad for 5 years.  I now have a dx of PTSD due to that.  My mother was a very demanding and unhappy person, she still is.  I always swore I would never be like her.  But I find my self nit picking and yelling when I should not be.  It sucks when you realize you are exactly who don't want to  be.