Life

[jenn981478]

I am not sure what is going on right now.  My SO works out of town for 45 days at a time and gets one week home then back to work we go visit him EOW.  Well he unexpectedly got to come home after not having break since Mid November.  He was well over due.  Well he shows up sometime yesturday and when we got home he was asleep.  I was ok with that because after working 2 and a half months 7 days a week for 12 hours or more a day I can understand he was tired.  Well then today we got up I took our daughter to school taking our son with me(actually my stepson) it is just like he is mine though.   SO stayed home when I got home I cooked the 3 of us breakfast because I didn't have to work till 11am.  Well around 9:30 SO decides he was going to get his eye exam no problem with that I just thought maybe he would wait untill the time for me to go to work but I just blew it off.  Then knowing I get off at 6 or 6:30 he sends me a text asking if I wanted to just go out to eat Saturday and I said that was fine but I text back why do you have plans?  He then tells me he is going to see a friend that is like family that he has not seen since maybe October and wouldn't be gone long.  I was fine with that but now here it is 10 and he headed over to his friends at 6pm.  I am getting a little pissed and wondering WTH.  I figured since he is home that maybe he would want to spend some time with his family(me and the kids) considering he doesn't get his full week and has to go back Sunday.  I guess I was wrong.  I am just a little frustrated right now.  You know I take care of both kids (5 and 2), work 60 hours a week, taking 9 hours, drive EOW 4 hours one way so he can see his kids.  I am begining to wonder why I do this when he chooses not to spend time with us when he is here.  This life is not what I had pictured.  I didn't picture raising 2 kids alone.  I just want to feel appreciated and that we matter.  You know SO is the only parent SS has right now considering mom is unavaliable.  How do I get him to understand how I feel without sounding needy or like I am just being a witch.  I need advice because I am to the point I just want him to leave and it has only been a little over 24 hours.