Demanding Respect!

[Roosbabe]

Me and a friend of mine have been talking....and I think it's about time that we demand respect.  If you are the woman that goes into labor and is super laid back and you don't care what the hospital or doctor wants to do, then this doesn't regard you.  This is for all the women that don't feel comfortable to have a homebirth, for whatever reason.  So you still go to the hospital and get abused.  Now, I had two hospital births and never felt disrespected or belittled, but there are FAR too many women that leave there stripped of the dignity.  My friend, Andrea is one of them.  She had a birthplan and doula,  still she got yelled at by nurses, laughed at by her doctor, and cut (episiotomy) despite telling the doctor "no" right then and there.   Now, she is being smart and never going back to the doc or the hospital for normal birth.  But she will refuse to go down without a fight!!  She is writing a letter to this doctor sharing with him how degraded and humiliated she felt, just for asking questions or doing things differently.  I doubt he will care, but she owes it to herself to let him know that she is one woman that has a voice and will share it!  This same doctor abused another woman in the same way.  She told me her birth story of how he was the doc on call and he told her that he would NOT catch her baby unless she laid down on her back and put her feet up in the stirrups.  Now, you tell me, there is NO medical reason to demand that position, so who in Sam hill does he think he is?!  Where did anyone come to think that they could tell us what to do with our bodies when it is none of their freakin' business?!  This doctor's name is Dr. Randy Hill.  I highly recommend that all the women in the Springfield area that wants to be treated like a human being stay away from him.

Granted there are few and far between nurses and doctors that show respect.  And God bless them!  But it's about time that we stand up and tell the ones that have forgotten how humans treat eachother that we will NOT put up with it any longer!  Even though I have never experienced these dreadful situations, my heart breaks for the many that have.  I love my friend for not letting things "just be".  I encourage anyone that is being abused, or has been to do something about it.  Write a letter, file a complaint, use your words, and discontinue service!  Would we return to a restaurant if the service was crappy, the food stank, and the prices were unreal?  Heck no!  We would raise a stink and tell our friends!  Do the same when it come to medical care!  Demand respect! 

[ethans_momma06]

Jan. 23, 2009 at 4:46 PM

Great post....that Doc. sounded like an ass

[Anouck]

Jan. 23, 2009 at 4:55 PM

You know, I keep hearing these stories, and I have to say, my experience was NOTHING like that. I gave birth in a Kaiser hospital, and Kaiser is a pretty large organization. But my doctors and nurses were nothing less than completely supportive and understanding. Some (not yet all, but they're working on it) hospitals offer the option of having a water birth, and ALL of the hospitals offer different ways of birthing, including birthing balls, supports for crouching or any other position you may want, and even birthing stools. They let you write up a birthing plan beforehand and keep it on file, so everybody is aware of your wishes by the time you come in. And at all times, they keep you informed of your options, and definitely DON'T force anything on you.

I'm sorry for the women who feel violated in any way, but I just wanted to point out the flip side of the coin, too :)

[JessicaRose]

Jan. 23, 2009 at 5:15 PM

I've always had the worst time with the nurses.  My deliveries are very fast, so I have only seen the doctor for about, hmm three minutes with my second baby, and twenty minutes with my first.  I never got to have my prenatal care doctor deliver.  So many times I have wanted to write a letter to the hospital and complain about the nurses, but I have been in full-on labor both times and never got a chance to get their names :(

If you could recommend and excellent doctor in Springfield, please please please let me know.  My last OB/GYN had absolutely no bedside manner, and when I wanted to switch, I would have had to pay an extra $1500 copay, which I thought was completely unfair.  Why should I pay over a thousand dollars 18 weeks into the pregnancy because my doctor is not making this a pleasant experience??  Okay, your rant made me rant, I'm finished now LOL

[TanyaR1024]

Jan. 23, 2009 at 11:30 PM

Amen! There are WAY too many women with stories like these, or much worse. There is a reason the term "birth rape" exists. I will avoid all this by staying the hell out of the sick house for my future labors. But for those that can't be home, they deserve to be treated as human beings. Women need to stand up and demand better for themselves and their babies.

[NoNonsenseMama]

Jan. 24, 2009 at 1:25 PM Great post! So many women walk away with a horrible experience and don't even realize it want the labor that made it horrible but how the labor was handled and how they were treated!

[kellybelly7570]

Feb. 9, 2009 at 11:49 AM

Great post!