Why Does DHS Lie To Us??

[tealadyd]

Just a little rant here...but I'm wondering why DHS always gives us incorrect information about fostering kiddos? Yesterday I received a call from DHS asking me to take in a 17 year old runaway for the night.  They had a permanent placement for her starting today.  I look at my schedule, which is clear enough to accomodate this request, and say "yes" without having even had a chance to discuss w/dh.  I figured we could both deal with one night.  What the hay? Besides that, I knew he had taught her last term, and had an overall positive opinion of her.

However when she gets here, I find out that that they are waiting for a bed for her in a local 24/7 girls facility.  And that they might have room for her tomorrow, or the next day, or maybe next week,  or......?  Well, this irks me for several reasons.  Number one because my schedule didn't allot for having a rebellious teenager living here with me on an indefinite basis.  Number two because when Demi, our last foster girl was here, they told me they did NOT have a local 24/7 girls facility.  And that the only place thing they could do with a gal in her condition was for me to have her committed to the adult mental facility, which was a horrible dreadful place for young girls to have to go to, OR to have her transferred to someplace in Portland, Oregon where we would not be able to see her, and she wouldn't have any contact w/ any of her other friends or family.  A difficult decision had to be made to keep Demi, knowing that she was mentally unstable, and I could do nothing to help her,  (But I could let her stay in my home and watch her deteriorate and act out her behaviours here, while I stood by watching helplessly), or...I could DEMAND that they move her  to a facility that would help her.  I did the latter. On a tip from someone in the "know", they said I had to DEMAND that this be done, don't take "no", or "maybe tomorrow" for an answer, but DEMAND  that she be moved from our home immediately, otherwise she will never get the help she needs.  So I did this.  And basically they just took her from our house and moved her into another house, where they told that foster mom that they were waiting for a bed for her in a 24/7 girls facility.  Well, guess what?  She's still there.  And still not getting the help she needs!!

Now they have pulled the same thing on me, asking me to take a girl with some very serious issues until they can get that ever elusive bed in the mysterious 24/7 girls facility that doesn't really exist!

And here's the kicker....My new girl comes from the same home that our little Demi got sent to.  So, basically we have just traded foster daughters! That mom was trying to get this little gal more help too.  And this is how it goes.  The kids just make the rounds through the system, and never seem to get the help they really need. Gracious.  I'm so frustrated.  And I'm wondering how long this one night request with a little runaway girl is gonna last. 

OK, I'm done ranting.  Feel better now.

[bdgirl]

Jan. 27, 2009 at 2:18 PM

Last night this girl that was graduating from a special program talked about how the foster care system does nothing to help children to get their life back on track.

It's sad that the program that is to help children, only passes the children that are difficult from home to home until they reach the age of 18.

Bless you for opening up your home to those children.

[Erin333]

Jan. 27, 2009 at 3:24 PM

I know it is frustrating. At least she will be in a loving home, cause that's not always the case. Like our 3 1/2 yr old that we got who had bruises all over his back that nobody in his foster home seemed to know where they came from and he came to us saying words like "stinky ass". Who says that to a 3 yr old?!! Just know that she is being placed in your home for a reason. A reason you may never know. Just love her up while you can and show her His love too. Hang in there!

[tonnismile13]

Mar. 12, 2009 at 12:50 AM

My sister was sent to about 13 different foster homes. no one wanted to help her. She ended up running away when she was 15 and the state more or less threw their hands up and said were done. She had a kid when she was 16 and is currently doing drugs. She just had her third child. Shes only 22. THE STATES DON"T DO ANYTHING TO HELP TROUBLED TEENS!!! They just keep passing them around until their old enough to get out of the courts!

sorry that was my ranting on that issue!!! God bless you for trying to help! :)