Illness and frustration

[firsttimerofone]

I've had active Lyme symptoms now for ten years and carried the illness for 18 years.  Since treatment 6 months ago its been a roller coaster ride.  My husband drives me nuts with his worries and sometimes resistance to seeing that I am sick and not kidding.  He talks about selling our house because the cost is too high or moving somewhere easier.  I understand we all feel this way sometimes but I've been sick with a nasty flu and cold for two weeks now and had a sick preschooler all week.  And when the kids are sick mommy is all they want even if she's very sick herself.  My dh doesn't get it.  He does what he can and sometimes I feel like he avoids me.  He's not interested all that much in intimacy of any type and I'm so exhausted from fighting Lyme that I want a serious vacation myself.  I am starting a support group in my area and my dh keeps getting on my case on how to advertise.  He loves to get on my case but is unwilling to get on his own.  I understand this illness sucks.  That it takes so much out of us all in our little family.  My mom move in soon with us with the bad economy.  I don't think my dh realizes when you get two alpha women in a room what its like.  He just thinks it will relieve us from any money stress.  He runs from his stress and then stresses me out.  He's driving me crazy !!!  I hate Lyme today.  I just do.  I wish this journey was easier.  He just exhausts me and I can't carry his load any longer.  I feel like I'm suppose to make his stress go away considering my disease is the one causing it.  Now in reality I get this statement is not true.  But emotionally I'm taking baggage that is not mine and putting it on my back.  I am so exhausted ladies.  I sometimes wish this wasn't my life.  I wish it would all go away.  Even though I feel pushed to start this support group not just for me, but also for others.  Because just as I am struggling to get by, I know there are other families just like mine who are trying to get by watching the bills pile up and wishing this illness never found them.  I had to get this out today or I was going to loose my mind.  Thanks, angele

[Pblu9207]

May. 25, 2009 at 12:04 PM

Dear Angie:

Just thinking about you. Lyme disease is very difficult on relationships. Most of our families are all infected at the same time. Often, it goes unnoticed that the husband has caught it also.

I am a single parent of four kids with lyme disease. I nearly died from Lyme two years ago. I am taking IV's and orals.

I am glad you are starting a support group.

If you need to talk, my phone number is 785 840 9387.

Peninah

http://www.kansaslymefighters. (an online support group. It would be great if you could start an chat group that meets regularly on this site).