To moms of brats...

[praisinghim2day]

Respect.  When did we lose the true definition?  Kids these days!  Since when is it okay for a child to run the household?  Since when is it okay to let a child call the shots?  Since when is a sense of entitlement an acceptable part of one's personality?  I see so many posts on message boards of parents asking for advice wondering what to do with their bossy kids.  When the op gets a response that doesn't cater to the child, all hell breaks loose!  All of a sudden the parents who don't put up with this kind of behavior and say they don't; automatically turn into a "mean, intimidating" mom who raises their children with "fear tactics" or worse yet, gets accused of not loving their kids.  When in all actuality, it's the parents who enable their children to be little hellions, who have a lot to learn about loving their kids.  Do you really think these kids who grow up with the sense of entitlement thinking they're the boss are really going to have a good life?  NO FREAKING WAY!  These kids aren't going to have any friends because it's their way or no way.  These kids are going to have a tough time in the real world when they realize they are not the center of the freaking universe!  Worse yet... they're not going to understand WHY they're not the center of the universe!

DUH!  It's not just the kids who need training!  Come on moms!  BE MOMS!!!  " My child WON'T do this"  "My child WON'T do that"  "I have to bribe my child to do such and such".  WAKE THE HELL UP!!  WHO'S THE ADULT??? It's your own damn fault your kid is acting this way.  YOU, mama, are ENABLING your child to be this way!  Your child IS MANIPULATING you!  Yes!!!  Your perfect little angel is a manipulator!!  A child is only turns out as good as the parent raises him/her.  A swift swat on the behind is NOT child abuse.  It is a LAST resort.  Your child will not starve if you don't make him/her a seperate meal than what everybody else is eating.  It is not child abuse to not make a seperate meal and EXPECT him/her to eat it.  The child WILL eventually get hungry enough to eat what is put in front of him/her.  It is NOT child abuse to not buy your child the latest and greatest toy on the market because he's throwing a fit in the aisle of the store.  Put the kid in the cart without the toy, and move on. 

Teaching your child respect, morals and values takes a good balance of love and tough love.  By giving into every little wish, want and desire is simply LAZY.  Your child will come to see that he/she is the boss, and you're not teaching him/her any different if you don't stand up to your kid.  It's not intimidation, it's not mean, it's called being a PARENT.  Parents should have certain expectations out of their children.  NOT vice versa.  It absolutely freaking kills me to see a kid throwing a tantrum in a store to get what he/she wants.  The parent calmly and quietly rolls over and plays dead and gives into that child just so they won't have to deal with the tantrum.  BS!!!  You don't REWARD a child for that kind of behavior!!!!!  That's just LAZY parenting.  And I use the term "parenting" VERY loosley.

just had to vent : )

[aurorabunny]

Feb. 17, 2009 at 10:42 AM

*shrug* IDK, I'm probably one of those moms you would see in the store and go on about how my child is a brat when in actuality he is severely autistic and has special needs.  Just seems kind of judgemental to me.  A child doesn't need to be spanked to have discipline either. 

I say let people parent the way they like, to each their own.

[praisinghim2day]

Feb. 17, 2009 at 10:49 AM

I'm not talking about children with special needs.  I'm talking about brats.  As I said... spanking is a LAST resort.  It's very rare that I do spank.  On the rare occasion that I do... it's one quick swat, not hard enough to leave a mark... just enough to get the kid's attention.  Not being judgemental, just pointing out the obvious.  People can parent anyway they want.  That's fine.  I just hope those parents don't have very high hopes and dreams for their kids when they grow up thinking they're the be all and end all of the universe.  That the universe must revolve around him/her.  That kid is in for a rude awakening in the real world as a so-called adult.  The parent isn't doing the kid any favors of any kind.

(Original Poster)

[patriciamarie3]

Feb. 17, 2009 at 1:54 PM

nope. i agree.  you cant just give kids what they want.  i have the hardest time with dh giving into the kids. i wont put up with it.  nip it in the bud eeeaaarrllyy!!!  my ss who is 7 was crying actual tears in the grocery store the other day because he couldnt get the popsicle he wanted when dad said they all had to agree on one kind...crying! he is 7!!!  wtf??!!  i wanted to snatch him up and take him to the bathroom for a good old fashion one! so my kids (ages 4 and 3) are learning consequences. because i dont want them to grow up and be bratty and unappreciative. they act up, and i put those popsicles back on the store shelf where they belong. end of story!  when they understand right from wrong, then they understand consequences for choosing wrong.  they need to accept consequences early on in life especially as quickly as kids try to grow up these days.

[ShaunaR]

Mar. 25, 2009 at 1:45 PM

Good post!  People need to start raising their kids with an their eye on the goal:  MAKING ADULTS.  My kids will be adults when they grow up which means they can handle not getting their way, well adjusted, able to ask for help when needed.  My kids are allowed to SUFFER their OWN CONSIQUENSES of their actions.  If I rescued them every time they would grow up thinking that is how the world works...and its not how it works at all!  Kuddos to you Praising!!! HUGS! Keep up the great work!

[Kayla7]

Jun. 14, 2009 at 1:17 AM

Can I just say... AMEN!!!!

THANK YOU FOR SAYING WHAT NEEDS TO BE SAID!! I'm a 22 almost 23 year old mom and I see parents letting their children run them all the time.... how can we sleep at night knowing that our future *our children* are turning out that way. and yes spanking is a last resort but A NECESSARY ONE!!!!! I was spanked when I was a younger child and I turned out JUST FINE!!! my mother taught me morals i went with out supper when I decided I did not want to eat what she made and when I caused a scene in public, she marched my butt out to the car and gave me a good old fashion one. I had two hellion brothers we've all been introduced to good old fashion punishment hell when we were kids parents were still allowed to use wooden spoons and belts and ill be dammed if they want to call my parents child abusers... i am thankful everyday that I was taught dicipline and respect. My brothers and I are all college graduates and have good paying carreers and I am also proud to say we would not have gone far in this world unless our parents stripped us of our brattiness when we were young. I've had dear occasions revoked for my decisions to test the waters and I learned the hard way too. I just wish more parents were like mine and many others out there. I'm sorry but to each their own to a CERTAIN EXTENT... if a parent wants to raise their kids solely on hugs and kisses then how will that child know right from wrong? we are spoiling our next generation and running there futures into the GROUND with the ways we are raising them nowadays. look around you... kids were never this wild and disrespectful when I was younger or when my parents were younger and it's truely SAD. we need to get our future under control and stop letting them control us!!

thank you for you post.

and in response to the special needs comment... seriously... obviously you would be more then an exception... it's a very heroic job to be a parent of a special needs child and no one would ever judge you for your deciplinary decisions... but for children who are more then capable of knowing the difference from right from wrong and understand how and why there are consequences they are the ones the OP was talking about. BRATS!!!