Letter to the school

[midnightmoma]

Re: Ethan Martin

 

Mr. Long,

I understand the school as well as Ms. Miranda is having behavioral issues with Ethan. I am fully aware and very motivated to help you and the school resolve these issues. I feel some things need to be in place to protect him. In order for him to thrive in a school setting; a clear understanding of his condition and limitations needs to be addressed.

Ethan has been dealing with ADHD since the age of three, properly diagnosed at age 5. He has been evaluated by a neurologist, psychiatrist, a developmental pediatrician and a regular pediatrician to insure the proper diagnosis and treatment. In addition, he has and will continue to work with Mrs. Angela Williams and the Doctors at Waccamaw Mental Health.

Ethan is socially challenged in his inability to interact with teachers and students in an appropriate manner; he needs encouragement, guidance and praise to help him meet his academic, social and emotional needs daily.

Traditional discipline do not work well for any ADHD child, the negative behavior are related to lack of impulse control, hyperactivity of the mind, and frustrations from being easily distracted and interrupted. Education of yourself and the staff that comes in direct contact with him is one of my goals, I believe the more a person understands ADHD and the other issues, the more able that person is to deal with the issues without harm to the child's self-esteem, self-worth and self-concept. Attached you will find some facts and guidelines that we have found very beneficial in improving his behaviors at home.

I understand you have hundreds of students and Ms. Miranda has twenty others students in the classroom and can not focus all her attention on my son; I am not asking anyone to do that. Simple techniques adopted in the school can have a positive impact on his daily school activities and teach him self-control and appropriate behavior. Rebuilding a positive and understanding relationship with you, his teachers and the staff will lessen his anxiety, fear and mistrust towards all involved.

I personally feel he is under a microscope, the staff is hypersensitive to his actions and reactions and act to harshly for the behavior. A serious event, dangerous, or harmful actions to himself or others should NOT be ignored and should be handled immediately. Non-dangerous or threatening behaviors are handled best if caught early and redirected into a more productive, appropriate behavior. Praise is very important, not only does it show the child what is expected, but also how to engage in more behaviors that are acceptable; it also gives a child a good since of self worth and builds much needed self-esteem. Time-outs work well, not as a form of punishment but rather in a time of high frustration levels, it will allow him time to regain control of himself and then rejoin the group.

Ethan is very aware of his behaviors, some are age appropriate, developmentally appropriate, others are ADHD related and related to his frustration level. All of which can be lessened. It seems his negative behavior is getting the brunt of the attention; placing a lot of attention on the negative does not teach him what is acceptable or expected. In fact, it does the opposite, it teaches him negative behavior is the only way to be seen or heard.

I am not one that believes my child is perfect; I too get frustrated. Frustration is not productive and giving up is not an option, I will do what is best for my son to be the best he can be, and I hope you feel the same. We are not dealing with a "bad child" or a child from a troubled or broken home. What we are dealing with is a medical condition. Issues that arise must be dealt with in an appropriate manor to lessen the risks of other conditions like ODD, LD, anxiety, drug and alcohol abuse, and high school drop out, etc... ADHD is not a handicap, nor an excuse to do what ever; I do not see it as a disability. I see it as a challenge that must be worked on daily. Part of the challenge is finding ways to work around the ADHD, and one of the many things I have learned is, I can not treat him or discipline him like a "normal" child or expect him to be able to do things like, listen, sit still, pay attention , etc...without positive praise and supervision. Furthermore, I do not treat him with kid gloves; I must keep ADHD in mind with the behaviors and act accordingly and fairly.

I hope this letter is informative and useful in helping Ethan in the school setting. Furthermore, I look forward to working much closer with you and the staff as a united front If more information or tools are needed, please feel free to let me know. I can be reached at home or on my cell to disguise any problems or solutions. Please keep in mind I am in class Mondays from 9-2, Tuesday I am at the hospital from 6:45-3:30, Wednesdays 8:30-2, Thursdays 9-11.

Thank You,

Stephanie Martin

 

 Tips

concentrate on only dealing with the serious behavioral problems so that the student does not become overwhelmed

Promote high self-esteem: be friendly, respect opinions, provide immediate feedback, give reinforcement for any improvement.

Maximize academic improvement: allow for flexibility in amount of time needed to complete a project, offer alternatives to writing (ex. typing), establish small tasks leading up to the completed project, break it down.

Schedule activities to accommodate student's fluctuating energy levels: intermix high and low energy activities throughout the day, send student on errands if he or she has energy to burn, encourage active ways of answering questions during discussions.

Reward success: use stickers, post points on a chart, shake hands, smile, use verbal praise.

Grab the student's attention: eye contact, give short, easy-to-understand instructions, insist that students repeat back information, use non-verbal cues to quite the students such as raising a hand or blinking the lights, give private cues that student is off-task such as a hand on their shoulder.

Encourage a cooperative environment, not competitive.

When ADHD children become upset, a time-out may be helpful to allow them time to think quietly about the conflict and resolve it on their own. Children can rejoin the group when they feel calm and in control.

Fatigue, stress, and pressure can test children's self-control and lead to inappropriate behavior, so provide opportunities for rest and relaxation throughout the day. Examples include stretching or quiet times. Engage children in interactive learning.

minimize distractions by putting the child's desk close to yours and in a quite place

provide a strict routine and have small segments of work followed by breaks

frequently ask the child to repeat oral instructions

adjust your expectations and the student's workload; realize that sometimes students with ADHD cannot do the same amount of work as other students

coach the student on how to make friends and how to play appropriately with others

Establish realistic and achievable goals.

Daily behavior chart allow parents to know their child’s strengths, weakness and areas of improvement or needed improvement

 

 

 

CC: Ms. Miranda, Mr. Long, Mrs. McDavid, Mrs. Lewis, Mrs. Williams